Frank Ramos’ Post

Many ways to kill the Good Ideas and enthusiasm of your CO workers. 1. Its against company policy. 2.it doest fit into our system. 3.it will never be approved. 4.The timing just isn't right. 5.It didn't work before. 6.i will think about it. 7.we are not ready for that. 8.put your ideas in writing to me, will get back to you. 9.lets form a committee. let's start conversation if you agree or disagree

I’ve been breaking the rules for as long as I can remember. But that doesn't mean rules don't matter. The way I look at it, you can’t break a rule unless you know and understand it. Then, when you break it infrequently and intentionally, it carries so much more weight and emphasis than just doing things by the book. This applies to: ✍️ Writing — Go ahead and start the occasional sentence with "and", use fragments, invent a word. But not every time or else we grammar police will assume it's because you just don't know the right way to do it. 💼 Business — Zig when others zag. Those brave enough to break outside the expectations will enjoy the benefits of uncrowded territory. 👻 Career Growth — Do: allow your individuality to shine through so people remember the person as well as the talent. Don't: arrive uninvited for an unscheduled skip-level meeting at your boss's boss's house. 👶 Parenting — ice cream for dinner on occasion is an amazing way to get your kids' attention. Ice cream for dinner every night is a good way to get CPS's attention. 🦅 Where else? — there are opportunities to break the rules and stand out in just about every area of our lives, personal and professional. Make breaking the rule a powerful exception. Rulebreaking can be a secret weapon so long as we use it infrequently and with discretion. How have you broken the rules recently? (Please note I said "the rules" and not "the law." We don't need the FBI involved today.) #rulebreaking #grammarpolice #lifehacks #careeradvice #businessgrowth

Know what I'm working on lately? Half-assing things. 🤭 Not the stuff that matters, of course. But not everything truly matters! So not everything should get my A+ effort. The mess that's been piling up on my kitchen counter for days? ↪️ Tonight I half-assed cleaning it up. That task I've been putting off because I was scope-creeping myself? ↪️ I got it done by taking the half-ass way. When I feel like skipping out on writing in my journal, again? ↪️ Half-assing it works better than nothing. When you have a brain that's wired for perfectionism, this stuff is harder than it might seem. Which is kinda why I'm writing this post. "Half-assing" has an inherently negative connotation — but it's not actually an inherently bad thing. Some stuff deserves your A game. And that's exactly why you can't always give it. There's only so much A game to go around. It's a huge unlock to be able to confidently discern what needs 80-100% power, and what will be perfectly fine with 50-60%. (Or in the case of my kitchen counters, even 30% will do 😆) Half-assing doesn't need to be a bad thing. So I'm taking it back. Because when you half-ass the right things... You can whole-ass some amazing stuff.

Decision: Though a day late, we need to finish tomorrow. Everything is pretty much set for the end but, as things went along, it's going to have a multi-tiered/layered ending and I need a fresh head for that. Any slip and I could potentially wreck suspension of disbelief, and if that occurs, I've failed the reader. I don't fail my readers (as a practice; sometimes readers feel failed but you know your audience is wide enough when some negative reviews come in; ironically, if you have a bunch of good reviews, if a bad one comes in, it's a good sign of reader variety, defined as extended audience; if constant bad reviews come in, then you need to do some reevaluation).

How helpful are your 'sorry's? Do you, like me, sometimes fall into the trap of the self-centred sorry? Here's a tip for saying sorry well. For those who prefer to read, here's the transcript: So saying ‘sorry’, which I needed to do again this morning, as quite often happens. I had failed to pay somebody. And I was apologizing. And as I started to open my mouth to go down an old pattern of saying ‘sorry’ multiple times, and the other person saying ‘it's ok’ multiple times, I was focused on this tip that I find helpful. When we say sorry, my invitation is to look at the impact on the other person. So to keep our focus on what our actions that we regret did to the other person, rather than how guilty we are feeling about it. When we're guilty, we are tending to absorb energy from the other person to make us feel better, or at least that's the risk. And what we want to be doing is focusing on what might have happened to the other person and how we deal with that impact, and what we can do differently. 

Have you ever wondered why actions speak louder than words? It’s because actions tell you who someone really is, rather than just who they claim to be. It costs you more to do something than to say something, because you have to pay with effort and accountability. You’ll see the results of the litmus test of character in a person’s works. It’s like the old parable of knowing a tree by it’s fruit. If there’s good fruit over time, it’s a healthy tree. There’s a higher price on action and a higher cost to pay for getting actions wrong. False words can put a small stain on the purity of your name, but a vile action can all but blot it out. ⬇️ 💡I teach you the power of three small words so that you can build and protect an amazing personal and professional future. 📚My book The YOU Not Me Mindset is available via Amazon and Audible: https://lnkd.in/e9u2zKZZ 📨Join the many subscribers who receive The YOU Not Me Letter direct to their inbox every Saturday morning. ✏️Subscribe for free at YouNotMe.Substack.com!

Always learn to forgive and forget. Don't keep a scoreboard. Every time your partner accepts or makes a mistake and apologizes, forgive them and let it go. Don't pretend to forgive someone and then bring up what they've done and apologized for in the past when there's a dispute. Also, anytime you are correct in a debate, remain quiet. Don't bring it up in front of your partner. You can be correct while remaining silent. Your lover will already know you're correct and will feel cherished since you didn't tell them. Practice empathy to create an environment of emotional safety. Verbally express your understanding of your partner's point of view on an issue before you state yours. When problems arise, instead of solving them unilaterally, work together to find win-win solutions. Brainstorm together until you find an idea that works for both of you.

In a post yesterday Ben Meer posted about his process for reviewing outcomes of our actions. But that wasn't what caught my attention. In his post he made a small comment about dealing with situations that didn't work out the way we wanted them to. "Be soft on the person, hard on the problem." Systems are amazing. Technology makes it possible to get so much more done in our life. (Can you imagine spending hours washing your clothes by hand everyday?) BUT, sometimes we forget that people are the most important parts of our business. Put processes in place. Augment them with the best technology you can. But remember that people are not technology. "Be soft on the person, hard on the problem." This includes yourself since you are a person too! Here is Ben's post if you want to learn about his After-Action Review process: https://lnkd.in/ghPdADdi

This is great advice. If you make it easy for me to review now, I’ll be more likely to spend my time mentoring you on the pleading instead of setting it to the side and reviewing when you aren’t around.