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How to Attract Girls

Co-authored by John Keegan

Last Updated: May 16, 2024 Approved

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Whether there's a special girl you can't stop thinking about, or you're just single and open to meeting
someone new, you might be wondering how you can be more attractive to the ladies. Well, you're in the
right place! We've rounded up the best tips for making a good impression and showing a girl just how
awesome you are, no crazy stunts required. Check out the tips below to learn how to present yourself in
the best way possible and hopefully win the affection of a special girl.

Ways to Attract a Girl

To attract a girl, be confident, approachable, and don’t pretend to be someone you’re not.

Tell her funny jokes and smile at her. Actively listen to what she has to say.

Try to find common interests to get to know her better and create a bond.

Method 1

Being Awesome

Step 1 Build your self-esteem...

1
Build your self-esteem and confidence. Self-confidence and self-esteem are very attractive qualities.
Girls will fall head over heels for a guy that is confident in himself and what he can do. Do things that
build your confidence in yourself like volunteering, learning a new skill, or traveling.[1]

You can build confidence by volunteering with an organization like Homes for Humanity. This will give
you the chance to prove to yourself and everyone else that you can do something and make a
difference.

You can also boost your confidence by learning a new skill, like a second or third language. This can be
done easily and for free online with sites like Livemocha.

Step 2 Don’t compare yourself...

Don’t compare yourself to others. This is not going to make you feel any better about yourself. The only
person you can ever be is you and that is great! Show the world how awesome you can be and stop
trying to be somebody else’s brand of awesome.[2]

Don’t try to act like anyone other than yourself either. Girls will notice you trying to hard and being all
fake and they will not find that attractive. Acting like some gangsta thug when you grew up rich in the
suburbs? Sorry, poser. She’ll notice. Just be you and be happy about being you. Girls will find that very
attractive.

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Step 3 Take care of yourself and your appearance.

Take care of yourself and your appearance. Don’t neglect personal hygiene or your wardrobe.[3] Why
would a girl like you if you didn’t even like yourself enough to take care of your body? Wash your hair
and body regularly, use deodorant, wear clothes that don’t have holes or stains, and brush your teeth.
[4]

Don't worry too much about wearing brand name clothes. She'll notice a lot more if your clothes fit you
well and are in colors that make you look great, not what letter is written on the chest.

Don't go overboard, of course. Some gel in your hair is probably good, but it shouldn't look wet and be
rock hard, you know?

For example, you might wear a nice-fitting T-shirt, well-fitting jeans, and an Apple watch or cool
bracelet.[5]
A lot of times, guys actually aren't used to wearing well-fitting clothes. With this in mind, try to wear
clothes are a little bit tighter than what you think they should be.[6]

Step 4 Be approachable...

Be approachable. Don’t seem angry, upset, douchey, or otherwise unpleasant to talk to. If you seem like
you’re mad at her every time you talk to her, why would she want to talk to you, much less date you?
Smile, be friendly, and try to make yourself easy to talk to by, you know, talking.

Step 5 Be an amazing person.

Be an amazing person. Be someone that girls want to date. You don’t have to be smart but at least try to
be knowledgeable and curious. Be a kind person that works hard to improve the lives of people around
you. And do something with your life. That part is really important. Get out there and work to make a
better life for yourself.

You can become more knowledgeable by reading about things that interest you. Did you know they
have entire books about the evolution of weapons like swords? Books about how they think dinosaurs
killed their prey? Yeah, library time.

Consider your dreams. What do you want for your life? What is your great passion? Showing that
passion is really attractive to girls: they want to think that you'll love them as much as you love...baseball
or whatever.

EXPERT TIP

John KeeganJohn Keegan

Dating Coach

Try to invest in yourself before looking for a partner. Notice qualities you admire in others and practice
honing them in your own life. Establish independence and a strong sense of who you are. Be your
authentic self; this will help you attract like-minded partners who have the same shared values.

Step 6 Be kind and...

Be kind and funny. Try to help her and always smile at her. A smile can make her day much better. Don't
try to act cool and don't always talk to your friends when she's around. Try to set some time alone with
her and talk to her in a kind voice.
Reader Poll: We asked 1742 wikiHow readers what’s most attractive about a person, and 56% said sense
of humor and charm. [Take Poll]

Step 7 Keep up in school.

Keep up in school. You don't have to get perfect grades, but at least shoot for "A"s and "B"s. Get good
grades, but don't become arrogant either. Offer to help her with assignments she is having trouble with
or offer to help her study for a test. Don't take it personally if she says she doesn't want your help
though.

Staying organized is also very important. You don't want to look like a mess in class all of the time trying
to find your homework in front of her. Most girls like organized boys that turn in their assignments on
time.

Step 8 Join sports....

Join sports. This can not only attract many girls, especially cheerleaders and other girls that also play
sports, but also boost your self-confidence. Girls like boys who are in shape and are athletic. Tryout for
sports and get on a team with people that go to your school.

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Method 2

Making Her Happy

Step 1 Get to know...

Get to know her. Talk to her and listen to her. Ask her about her family and where she grew up, her
religion and politics, and what she likes to do for fun. Don’t be critical or rude about her answers: they
are hers, not yours! Respect her ideas, her opinions, and her beliefs. Girls like it when you treat them
like people. If you want girls to find you attractive, respecting them as people is a great place to start.

For example, ask her about her favorite hobby, and then ask her how she got into that hobby. This is a
great way to work into talking about where and how she grew up, her family, etc.

Step 2 Find things you have in common.

Find things you have in common. She likes Metallica….you like Metallica…..bam! You now have
something to talk about! Ask her about the music she listens to, the movies she watches, and the things
she does in her spare time. Find some common ground and you will have a great way to get to know
each other and bond.[7]

Step 3 Be a good...

Be a good friend. If we guaranteed you wouldn’t get friend-zoned, we’d be lying. But being friends with
a girl and showing her what a wonderful person you are is the best way to attract her. Show her how
happy she’d be with you and then see how much happier you are with her.

Be supportive when she is having a hard day, help take her mind off of her problems, be available when
she needs help, and listen to her when she talks.

Step 4 Don’t be disrespectful.

Don’t be disrespectful. Don’t stare at her and then avoid eye contact. Don’t hover around her and then
never actually manage to say anything. Don’t make unwanted physical advances. Things like this will
upset her and definitely make you a lot less attractive.[8]

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Join the Discussion...

How do I rizz up a girl I just met?

WikiMountainCat42

58

WikiMountainCat42

I keep seeing this beautiful girl at a cafe I study at, and I really want to talk to her. But I feel so awkward.
What do I do? How do I get her t... Read More

John Keegan

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Great question. The first thing to do is to always go back to step one, which is your own mindset and
way of being. For you to approach her in th... Read More
WikiMongooseChaser121

WikiMongooseChaser121

Fully agree on the eye contact thing. Makes it so much easier to break the ice and then you’re already
halfway to starting a conversation. If s... Read More

See all 23 Replies and

Read Discussion

Expert Q&A

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Does wearing good clothes make you attractive?

John Keegan

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Definitely! Wearing well-fitting clothes can really make a big difference, and look much more stylish than
baggy garments.

Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.

Thank you for your feedback.

If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers
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Yes No

Not Helpful 43 Helpful 112

What should I wear to look stylish?

John Keegan
John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Wearing at least 1 piece of nice jewelry! Jewelry can be really stylish, whether it's a necklace, bracelet,
or something really simple.

Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.

Thank you for your feedback.

If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers
like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in
our mission. Support wikiHow

Yes No

Not Helpful 42 Helpful 90

What are must-have clothes for men?

John Keegan

John Keegan

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Definitely invest in a nice pair of jeans—good jeans should last you many years, plus they'll fit great.
Also, stock up on plenty of great-fitting T-shirts.

Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.

Thank you for your feedback.

If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers
like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in
our mission. Support wikiHow

Yes No

Not Helpful 33 Helpful 86

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Tips

Compliment her looks and she will feel confident. Understand her mind and you will know how to
interact with her.

Thanks

Helpful 14 Not Helpful 4

Girls like guys who understand them. So listening is very important.

Thanks

Helpful 12 Not Helpful 6

Know that "attracting" is just a part of a relationship.

Thanks

Helpful 8 Not Helpful 11

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References

↑https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hide-and-seek/201205/building-confidence-and-self-
esteem

↑https://zenhabits.net/lifes-enough-stop-comparing-yourself-to-others/

↑John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 13 July 2021.

↑https://www.everydayhealth.com/mens-health-pictures/essential-grooming-rules-for-guys.aspx

↑John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 13 July 2021.

↑John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 13 July 2021.

↑https://www.quora.com/How-do-I-find-more-common-topics-to-talk-with-girls

↑https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/out-the-ooze/201707/how-avoid-creeping-women-out

About This Article

John Keegan
Co-authored by:

John Keegan

Dating Coach

This article was co-authored by John Keegan. John Keegan is a Dating Coach and motivational speaker
based in New York City. With over 10 years of professional experience, he runs The Awakened Lifestyle,
where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He
teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de
Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's
Health. This article has been viewed 2,753,567 times.

29 votes - 78%

Co-authors: 154

Updated: May 16, 2024

Views: 2,753,567

Categories: Getting a Date

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