Llewellyn's 2025 Witches' Companion: Community Connection Belonging

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Contents

Healing Magic

Coming Out of the Broom Closet to Friends and Family

by Ari & Jason Mankey

The Altruistic Witch

by Autumn Damiana

The Introverted Witch

by Kate Freuler

Glamour Magic for Self-Care

by Deborah Castellano

You’re Going to Die: Don’t Skip This Even If You Want To!

by Gwion Raven

Magic Every Day

by James Kambos

The Shattered Witch: Return to Wholeness

by Nathan M. Hall

Practical Magic

Kitchen Magic

by Charlie Rainbow Wolf

Magickal & Spiritual Candles: How to Avoid Getting Burned

by Stephanie Rose Bird

Sensing Energies: Connect to the Energies of the Natural World

by Melanie Marquis

Magickal Morning Coffee with the Ancestors

by Lilith Dorsey

Get Your Hands in the Dirt: The Magick of Gardening

by Najah Lightfoot

Magical Found Objects

by Blake Octavian Blair

The Wild Witch’s Garden

by Dallas Jennifer Cobb

Magical Ideas

The Human Element of Witchcraft in the Age of AI

by Laura Tempest Zakroff

Changing Spiritual Paths

by Lupa

The Goddess as Queen

by Tess Whitehurst

A Modern Witch’s Wheel of the Year

by Phoenix LeFae

Reclaiming the Crone: Embody the Wise Woman Archetype for the Modern Age

by Ember Grant

Let’s Be Friends with Our Goddesses and Gods

by Barbara Ardinger

Magical Action

Witchcraft for Sale: How to Find a Legitimate Professional and Avoid Scams

by Rahjeena Drabarni

Magically Responsible Travel

by Emily Carlin

Witchcraft and the Deep Green Cause

by Dodie Graham McKay

Boundary Setting to Enhance Your Life and Your Magic

by Michelle Skye

Fight! Use Your Magical Will to Fight the Good Fight

by Emma Kathryn

Climate Change and Paganism

by Elizabeth Barrette

Rituals to Honor Military Service People

by Diana Rajchel

Calendars & Moons

January 2025

February 2025

March 2025

April 2025

May 2025

June 2025

July 2025

August 2025

September 2025

October 2025

November 225

December 2025

2025 New and Full Moons

Healing

Magic

Coming

Out of the

Broom Closet

to Friends and Family

Ari & Jason Mankey

Witchcraft is empowering and life-changing. Magick allows us to take control of our lives and circumstances. Honoring the Wheel of the Year brings us closer to nature and deepens our connection with planet Earth. Relationships with deity strengthen our resolve and make us the best versions of ourselves. Witches can travel to the veil between the worlds and back again, resulting in continuing relationships with lost loved ones.

But not every aspect of the Witch experience is a positive one. For many of us, coming out of the broom closet (revealing to friends and family that one is a Witch) can be a heartbreaking and painful experience. The world is much more tolerant today of alternative spiritualities than it was even twenty years ago, but telling those around you that you are a Witch can still result in broken friendships, lost job opportunities, and estrangement from family. There is no one way to come out to others about your practice of Witchcraft, but thanks to our own experiences (both good and bad), we have what we hope is some good advice.

Jason’s Story

When my grandparents found out that I was a Witch, they were heartbroken. That’s my most painful memory of coming out of the broom closet. My grandparents, who had accepted my gay brother without a second thought, simply couldn’t wrap their heads around a member of the family leaving the Christian faith. Growing up, I was extremely close to my grandparents, and their disappointment in me stung.

Perhaps worst of all, my grandparents’ disapproval hurt the relationship we had. Now every phone call we shared felt just a bit strained, and I began limiting what I would take over to their house to read. I knew that my grandparents still loved me, and I accepted their misguided worry as a reflection of that love, but more than anything else, I wanted our relationship to be what it had been previously. Many Witches might have resorted to magick to rectify the situation, but I chose to write them a letter.

Years later, I call that letter the Unitarian Universalist Letter, and it’s an apt title. (Unitarian Universalism is a diverse movement that includes Christians, Jews, atheists, and many Witches and Pagans.) My letter was not a plea to be okay with me leaving Jesus behind, but instead was an attempt to share with my grandparents the divine in everything. As a Witch, I have never believed that I hold all the answers or some sort of absolute truth. As long as people are treating others with kindness and decency, I don’t care what type of religion they practice (or don’t practice).

My letter had the desired effect, and my relationship with my grandparents was mended. Going forward, we no longer talked about religion, but my grandparents also no longer believed I was a devil worshiper sacrificing babies and spitting on effigies of the Christian cross. The tension that had been present in phone calls and letters dissipated, and things mostly returned to the previous status quo. (And after meeting my then Witch-girlfriend Ari, my grandparents might have started thinking that Witchcraft was good for me!)

My grandparents both passed in the early 2000s, but as a Witch, I can still feel them. At Samhain every year, their picture goes up on our ancestor altar, and I spend a few minutes once again in their presence. Now that they’re on the other side of the veil, I’m convinced that my grandparents are more than happy with my Witchcraft practice because it allows us to be together once again.

With the exception of my grandparents, I didn’t really have any other bad experiences coming out of the broom closet. Certainly there were some close-minded friends who didn’t like my choice to live as a Witch, but I’m guessing those friendships would have ended anyway. A friend who can’t accept the personal choices of another is not a friend worth having.

Ari’s Story

Jason was twenty-one and in college when he found Witchcraft. I was sixteen, going to Catholic school, and living in a townhouse with two brothers, one sister, and an overly religious mother and stepfather, so both practicing the Craft and coming out of the broom closet were nonstarters. My magick and rituals all took place secretly in the middle of the night while the rest of my family was asleep. It would be many more years before I dared to share my faith in the Goddess with my family.

After graduating high school, I went away to college, and with my family now an hour away, I began openly practicing the Craft on campus. But my Witchcraft practice was still something I couldn’t share at home, and I will never forgive my stepfather for once following me to an open Lammas ritual during my first summer home from college and embarrassing me in front of the other Witches and Pagans there. At that point, my mother and stepfather had figured out that I was a Witch, but they kept telling themselves it was just a phase and talked about the Craft in condescending and insulting terms. That was the last summer I spent at home with my family.

My father has always been supportive and understanding of my Witchcraft practice, while my mother threatened to skip my wedding and keep my younger siblings from attending if the ceremony wasn’t in a Catholic church. (I made sure to plan my wedding for a weekend when my dad had custody of the younger children.) Over the years, the more judgmental members of my extended family have started weird rumors about my spirituality and relationships, but the end result has usually resulted in my close-minded aunts and uncles looking like fools. My life has turned out pretty well, and the petty rumors come across more like sour grapes than anything else.

Twenty-plus years after learning that I was a Witch, my mother still has problems dealing with it. Holiday cards always mention Jesus, and she’s the only family member who is unaware that I wrote a book on spellcraft with Jason and some other members of our coven. The situation will never be ideal, but I just remind myself that the loss is hers and not mine. As a Witch, I am an even better version of myself!

Coming Out to Friends and Family

While Witchcraft is an important part of our lives, we are both more than just Witches. We both have a variety of hobbies and interests away from Witchcraft, as well as friends outside of the Witchcraft world. In many of those spaces, Witchcraft doesn’t even come up, nor does it have to. Your spiritual beliefs are your business, and they don’t have to be shared with anyone. If telling your eighty-five-year-old great-grandmother that you are a Witch is going to upset her, why bother? Many of the first modern Witches happily spent the majority of their lives inside the broom closet. But there are lots of circumstances where that is just not possible, and besides, who wants to hide who they are!

Let People Judge You for You

Because we live in Silicon Valley, California, casual acquaintances and new friends all assume that we both work in the tech industry as computer programmers. When people ask Jason what he does for a living, he usually responds with write books about history instead of leading with Witchcraft author. Over time, people do find out that he writes Witchcraft books, but by that point, most of them have already decided that he’s okay to hang out with and a pretty decent person. The Witchcraft part becomes just another facet of his life, not the only defining characteristic of his existence. Human beings are complex creatures, and we are more than just our spiritual beliefs. Most of us have a wide variety of interests, hobbies, and friends.

You Don’t Have to Hide the Craft, but You

Don’t Have to Be Loud about It, Either

Ari once went to a local art fair with a coworker she had been growing close to. While looking at jewelry, Ari oohed and aahed over a ring decorated with a crescent moon and a piece of onyx. Ari’s coworker already knew that Ari had an interest in crystals, but a ring with a crescent moon? Putting the meaning of the crystals and the ring together, Ari’s coworker deduced that Ari was a Witch!

Crystals, astrology, tarot, and candle magick are more popular than ever and are topics of interest to a wide variety of people. Sharing an interest in those things can lead to discussions about one being a Witch. And if no one ever connects the dots between your herbal apothecary and your crystal collection, that’s fine too! But if you want to share your Witchcraft with others, it’s possible to do so subtly over time, and by doing so, you’ll have a pretty good idea of how they will react to the news.

You Don’t Have to Advertise Being a Witch

It simply doesn’t make much sense to introduce yourself as a Witch to someone you’ve just met at a coffee shop, or make Witchcraft the first topic of conversation at a new job. In fact, doing so might result in an immediate (negative) judgment, or simply make you an object of curiosity. We are both proud to be Witches, but it’s not the only thing that defines who we are as people.

Be Honest

We get to choose our friends, but not so much our families, and as a result, sharing a Witchcraft practice with certain family members can be daunting. Coming out of the broom closet to a judgmental and close-minded family member is never easy, but a little honesty will go a long way. Explain why you are a Witch and how it benefits your life. Point to similarities between the Craft and (any) former beliefs you might have held. Ask that your new practice be respected, and share your respect and love for the people with whom you are sharing this new part of your life.

Sometimes no matter what we do, a parent or a friend just won’t accept that Witchcraft is a part of our lives. In such cases, the best thing to do is keep being you. Be a good friend, be a good relative, live a giving and decent life, and those around you will have little choice but to accept you and your practice. And if someone does choose to shun you over the Craft, just remember that it is not your fault. They are the ones losing out on a friend, a brother, or a daughter.

Ari Mankey has been practicing Witchcraft and creating spells for over twenty years. Away from the Craft, she has devoted her life to medical laboratory science and developing the perfect whisky ice cream. She is a coauthor of The Witch’s Book of Spellcraft.

Jason Mankey has written nine books for Llewellyn and is a frequent speaker and teacher at Pagan festivals across North America. He lives in Northern California with his wife, Ari, where they run two local covens. You can follow him on Instagram and Twitter @panmankey.

[contents]

The

Altruistic

Witch

autumn damiana

Altruism is a complex concept. To most people, it means doing good for others and not for yourself. This is true to a point, but it’s an oversimplification. Altruism is an unselfish concern for the well-being of everyone, including strangers, and the desire to make people’s lives better without a thought for what can be gained. True altruism does not require thanks, a reward, or a quid pro quo relationship, nor should it be a way to for you to atone for some past wrongdoing or rack up some good karma. Altruism embodies generosity of the heart, but also of the spirit. When you act altruistically, you are showing that you can afford to give because you have faith that the universe will always provide for you.

It is a common misconception that altruistic people are always wealthy and give money to a cause because they can afford to be philanthropists. A quick online search for philanthropy fraud will turn up numerous articles about how the rich often give money for self-serving reasons, like tax cuts, bribes for politicians, or to secure their children’s entry into prestigious schools. People of every income level tend to give for recognition, and it’s all too common now to see selfies of people at charity events posted all over social media. This is a double-edged sword: is that person trying to raise awareness, or are they actually drawing attention to themselves for personal benefit?

Modern Witches should be mindful of altruism in their practices. We owe the Earth and its fellow inhabitants far more than we can ever hope to give back. Altruism can also become a deeply meaningful part of a Witch’s religious identity when combined with spirituality and magic. In his poem On Giving, Kahlil Gibran writes: There are those who give and know not pain in giving, nor do they seek joy, nor give with mindfulness of virtue; … Through the hands of such as these God speaks, and from behind their eyes He smiles upon the earth. ¹ Gibran reminds us that true altruistic acts can be a sacred and ecstatic experience where you literally become the force of divine intervention that people hope and pray for.

Grand Workings

Legend has it that in 1940, Gerald Gardner and his New Forest coven of British Witches performed a magical act called Operation Cone of Power. The intent was to keep Hitler from landing on English soil at the height of World War II, after he had already invaded France. The Witches assembled, raised energy, and projected the thought into Hitler’s mind that you cannot cross the sea. Hitler never made it to Britain’s shores, so does this mean that the coven’s magical working was successful? Of course no one will ever know for sure, but many like to think that this altruistic act of patriotism was at least partly responsible. The story has also become a historical anecdote that is important to the current Witch narrative, which seeks to educate the public on the positive aspects of the Craft.

Another past example of widespread witchy altruism comes from the 1960s. A branch of feminists rooted in the Women’s Liberation Movement called themselves W.I.T.C.H. and staged elaborate magical and witch-themed protests against war, capitalism, class struggles, and the patriarchy in general. While the acronym started out as Women’s International Terrorist Conspiracy from Hell (obviously meant to provoke), its meaning would often change depending on the point of the protest. Women Interested in Toppling Commercial Holidays, Women Inspired to Commit Herstory, and Women’s Independent Taxpayers, Consumers, and Homemakers are just a few examples. Despite the fact that a lot of the tactics of W.I.T.C.H. were merely theatrical, there is ample evidence of real Witchcraft practices at work within the organization.

In recent times and because of social media, we know that groups of Witches still gather together to bind the actions of harmful public figures, influence elections, and battle injustices such as racism, homophobia, and religious intolerance. It is a wonderful aspiration to undertake such lofty magical endeavors, and if you have a coven where you believe that this is a possibility, then go for it. However, for many, it is much more feasible to concentrate on workings that are personal and closer to home.

Starting Small

Altruism can always be a magical act if you do it mindfully and/or work with an altruistic deity. Simply stop, take a few deep breaths, and attune yourself to