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Some zingers from their opening monologue:

Poehler said she hasn't paid attention to the "Zero Dark Thirty" torture controversy, "But when it comes to torture, I trust the lady who spent three years married to James Cameron," referencing director Kathryn Bigelow. 

And discussing their Golden Globes looks, Fey joked, "The Hunger Games" isn't just a movie. It's what I call the six weeks it took me to get into this dress." Poehler perfectly followed up with, "Ang Lee's been nominated for 'Life of Pi' which is what I'm going to call the six weeks after I take this dress off!"

They then roasted everyone from Ben Affleck to Sarah Palin. Watch the opening monologue below:

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The former president took the stage to a standing ovation to present Steven Spielberg's "Lincoln," one of the nominees for best motion picture drama.

While everyone seemed to be surprised by the 42nd president's presence, a source tells E! Online, "It was not a last-minute thing. It was in the works and came together about five days ago."

The idea for Clinton's secret appearance reportedly came from Steven Spielberg's camp, with the source adding, "Steven and Bill are quite close."

Clinton introduced the film by saying: "President Lincoln’s struggle to abolish slavery reminds us that enduring progress is forged in a cauldron of both principal and compromise. This brilliant film shows us how he did it and gives us hope that we can do it again."

Watch his full appearance below:

Many now even think they should be next year's hosts. It's a must-watch:

Taylor Swift did not look pleased when Adele's name was called as winner of Best Original song.

Adele's "Skyfall" theme song beat out Swift's "Safe & Sound" from "The Hunger Games."

To add insult to injury, Tina Fey later quipped to the newly single singer with a penchant for younger men: "Taylor Swift, you stay away from Michael J. Fox's son ... you need some me time."

After Tina Fey said Daniel Day-Lewis looked like a "young E.T." the co-host pointed to Glenn Close and joked, "Look how drunk she is?!" Cue Close's strange convulsions, leading Fey to say, "maybe she needs a medic."

As his girlfriend Stacy Keibler was laughing by his side, George Clooney allowed Amy Poehler to sit on his lap and drink Moët during this funny cut-away segment.

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Adele's "Skyfall" won "Best Original Song" while Danes, who just gave birth a month ago, won for Best Actress in a TV Drama for "Homeland."

The awards show marked the first time both have been seen since giving birth.

Despite having the flu, Jennifer Lawrence managed to give a charming acceptance speech after winning Best Actress in a Comedy for her role in "Silver Linings Playbook."

The 22-year-old actress referenced a "First Wives Club" line saying "I beat Meryl!" and then thanked everyone from her parents to director David O'Russell and Harvey Weinstein for “killing whoever you had to kill to get me up here today.”

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While accepting her award for Best Supporting Actress for "Les Misérables," Anne Hathaway gave a big thank you to fellow nominee Sally Field for being a crusader against typecasting. 

“As the girl who started out as the Princess of Genovia, I can’t tell you how encouraging it was that the Flying Nun grew up to be Norma Rae ... and Norma Rae grew up to be Mary Todd Lincoln."

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While Ben Affleck was snubbed for a director nod at the Oscars, he got a double dose of vindication when he and the film scored victories for Best Director and Best Picture, Drama.

"I don't care what the award is," he said while accepting the directing statue. He then thanked his wife, actress Jennifer Garner, saying "She's the reason I'm standing here."

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Garner was scheduled to take the stage to present an award almost immediately after her husband Ben Affleck was played off from his "Argo" win.

Appearing at the mic, the actress squeezed in a few more "thank yous" on Affleck's behalf—including one to "Argo" producer, George Clooney.

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"Zero Dark Thirty" got Jessica Chastain a Golden Globe, but the film itself lost out to "Argo" for "Best Drama" and Kathryn Bigelow lost Best Director to Ben Affleck.

In her acceptance speech, Chastain discussed her "struggle" to become an actress and thanked Bigelow, saying she's done so much for women in Hollywood.

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Not only did Lena Dunham's hit HBO show "Girls" win Best TV Comedy, she also took home Best Actress in a TV Comedy, beating out show hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. 

But she did still thank them in her speech, saying "They have gotten me through middle school and mono ... and I worship them."

Dunham also thanked Chad Lowe, after Hillary Swank—his wife at the time—famously forgot to do so after winning an Oscar for "Boys Don't Cry" in 2000.

Watch Dunham's acceptance speech below:

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We think.

While the speech was sometimes confusing (Is she quitting acting? Wasn't she already out? Why does she hate Honey Boo Boo so much?), Foster's words on the right to privacy and the beauty of being abnormal were heartfelt and meaningful.

Some highlights from the speech: 

• When I say I'm done with acting, I'm done with acting, I'm really done, I'm done, I'm done, I'm done. 
• So, a declaration … that I'm a little nervous about I'm just gonna put it out there, right? Loud and proud, right? So I'm gonna need your support on this. I am … single.
• I hope you guys weren't hoping this would be a big coming out speech tonight, because I already did my coming out about a thousand years ago, back in the stone age. In those very quaint days when a fragile young girl would open up to trusted friends and family, co-workers, and then gradually, proudly to everyone who knew her, to everyone she actually met. 
• If you had been a public figure from the time you were a toddler, if you'd had to fight for a life that felt real and honest and normal against all odds, then maybe you too might value privacy above all else.
• There is no way I could ever stand here without acknowledging one of the deepest loves of my life, my heroic co-parent, my ex-partner in love but righteous soul sister in life. My confessor, ski buddy, consigliere, most-beloved BFF of 20 years, Cydney Bernard. Thank you Cyd. I am so proud of our modern family.
  

Watch the speech in its entirety below:

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Click here to see who won the night's top honors >

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