We’ve been learning all about new and fun sexual fetishes in 2024. From sploshing to gooning and embracing the giantess kink – we’re really expanding our horizons.
Indulging in a sex act (as long as it’s legal) is a great way to get off, but sometimes a fetish we’ve developed can catch us a bit off guard, leaving us to wonder where on earth it came from.
For example, 36-year-old Logan* developed a foot fetish in his mid twenties and has been ‘obsessed with beautiful feet and toes’ – however he just can’t explain it.
He suggested that this fetish, among others, could have stemmed from porn – but while porn can be influential in shaping what turns us on, this certainly isn’t the only reason we develop these sexual preferences.
So, to get to the bottom of where a fetish comes from, Metro enlisted the expertise of certified sex therapist at SexualAlpha, Aliyah Moore.
Where do fetishes come from?
She tells Metro.co.uk: ‘A multitude of factors can impact the formation of fetishes or kinks, given the complexity and diversity of human sexuality.
‘An individual’s particular sexual preferences can be influenced by neurological processes, hormones, and genetic predispositions.
‘Some kinks or fetishes may have their origins in early life experiences, which can gradually mould a person’s sexual preferences and interests.’
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These experiences during our formative developmental years can be hugely responsible for what arouses you as an adult, having left a lasting impression.
Aliyah says: ‘This could include specific items, textures, or situations that subsequently play a crucial role in a person’s dreams or desires related to sexuality.’
Kinks and fetishes can also evolve from our exposure to media and cultural influences, Aliyah explains.
These can come in the form of TV shows, porn, music videos and representation in films that speak to our upbringing.
The difference between a kink and fetish:
A kink is something sexual that someone likes to do with themselves or consensually with partners, to make their sexual experience more erotic.
A fetish is when something must be present in order for the person to achieve sexual arousal or enjoyment.
Another way fetishes can develop is from experimentation in relationships.
Aliyah says: ‘In a partnership, people can discuss and work through their wants, which opens up new possibilities for them to explore and add to their sexual repertoire.
‘Different fetishes or kinks can become accepted and normalised in a partnership through shared experiences, open communication, and a sense of trust.’
More uncommon fetishes:
- Stigmatophilia: Arousal from body piercings or tattoos is known as.
- Hierophilia. Sexual arousal or attraction to religious or sacred things or ceremonies
- Chronophilia: The fetish of being attracted to people who are in a particular age range. It may show itself as attraction to people who are significantly younger or older, or it may take the form of situations involving age disparities.
- Agalmatophilia: Getting aroused by dolls, mannequins, or statues.
- Nasophilia: A nose-related arousal or attraction.
- Mechanophilia: An infatuation with vehicles or other mechanical objects combined with a sexual affinity to machinery.
- Formicophilia: Arousal from insects crawling on the body.
- Spectrophilia: This fetish is centered around being attracted to or aroused sexually by ghosts or other paranormal beings. People who have spectrophilia may claim to have had thoughts about ghosts or other paranormal activity, or they may have had sexual interactions.
- Ursusagalmatophilia: The arousal of sexual attraction in people by stuffed animals like teddy bears and other plush creatures. Those who have this fetish may find these items to be sexually exciting or include them into their sexual practices.
At what age do our fetishes materialise?
‘Sexual preferences can imprint at different phases of human development and then later appear as kinks or fetishes,’ says Aliyah.
‘People are more vulnerable to the effects of outside forces, so an individual’s sexual psyche may form associations with early exposure to specific stimuli, such as specific images, scenarios, or even objects.’
But there’s no rule book for when these experiences will present (if they do) as a fetish in later life. They can appear at any age and you should never be ashamed of them.
What emotions can a fetish trigger?
Again, there’s no rule book for what people should or shouldn’t feel when a fetish manifests.
Aliyah explains: ‘Some people may initially feel confused or concerned. People may start to doubt whether their wants are acceptable due to social and cultural norms and the possibility of stigma associated with particular fetish.
‘People may feel that their kinks are strange or deviant as a result of society’s sometimes constrained and conventional depictions of sexuality, which can breed negative emotions or self-judgement.’
What’s important, Aliyah notes, is that everyone should explore their kinks when they’re ready and in a safe and consensual environment – without shame.
The origins of the foot fetishes and other kinks
A foot fetish isn’t uncommon and, for Logan, Aliyah explains it may have originated from ‘happy childhood experiences with feet’.
‘Chance sightings of bare feet, positive reinforcement during foot-related activities, or early sexual experiences involving feet could all have been factors,’ says Aliyah.
Foot fetishes
It seems more than 10% of people in the UK are into toe-sucking, so it shouldn’t be taboo.
Metro spoke to Sarah Louise Ryan, a relationship expert at Tailor Matched, who told us how to approach the subject of toe-sucking and foot play with a partner.
Sarah tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Anything that isn’t deemed a “sexual norm” or widely talked about in regards to sex can often be because it’s got stigma or shame attached to it.
‘Ultimately, we are all different and have different needs inside and outside of the bedroom – so if we could open up more conversations around kinks and fetishes the less people would “yuck other people’s yums.”
Having a foot fetish and wanting to explore toe-sucking is nowhere near as unusual as it may sound. In fact, there are many different reasons feet can be sexually alluring.
Sarah says: ‘Freud suggested it is because the shape of them can be quite phallic and so the foot resembles the penis.
‘Another reason, reported by many sexologists, is that the feet are sensitive parts of the body (with many nerve endings) – meaning they can cause arousal when touched.
‘Some people like delicate feet and like to worship people’s feet as part of submission to a dominant of any gender, this can be part of the wider BDSM experience with a specific fetish entailed.
‘Nearly half of fetishes are associated with feet. Different people have different reasons to being attracted to feet on a sexual level.’
‘How the particular body part is portrayed in the media or how society views them might influence a person’s tastes and cause a foot fetish.’
When it comes to a bondage fetish – which is typified by an obsession with being controlled or restricting a partner – this may have its roots in early encounters with power dynamics and restriction, or it may emerge as a result of investigation and encouraging feedback in partnerships that are consensual in adulthood.
The role of fantasy and imagination in fetishes
Fantasy and imagination can play a huge part in the emergence of fetishes, too.
‘Erotic fantasies can have a big impact on the emergence of particular fetishes and wants, regardless of where they come from — from personal creation, cultural influences, or media intake,’ Aliyah explains.
Distinct and more uncommon fetishes or sexual preferences can be a result of the mind’s capacity to conjure up imaginative situations and link them to arousal, according to the sex therapist.
This essentially means that anyone could dream up any sexual preference and it could manifest into any fetish.
Do you have a story to share?
Get in touch by emailing [email protected].
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