Jon Hallett

Jon Hallett

Atlanta, Georgia, United States
6K followers 500+ connections

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Experience

  • Alliance Advisors Graphic

    Alliance Advisors

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    Greater Atlanta Area

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    Boulder, CO

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    Santa Cruz, CA

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    Greater Atlanta Area

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    Greater Denver Area

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    New York City

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    Atlanta, GA

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    Greater Atlanta Area

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    Greater Atlanta Area

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    Greater Atlanta Area

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    Greater Atlanta Area

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    Washington D.C. Metro Area

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    Washington D.C. Metro Area

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    Washington D.C. Metro Area

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    Greater Atlanta Area

Education

  • Lehigh University Graphic

    Lehigh University

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    Activities and Societies: Jeff Spicoli surf Competition Football team co-captain with Charles Jefferson

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    Activities and Societies: Bill and Ted travel Club

Honors & Awards

  • General Accomplishments

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    I am often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently.

    Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook 30-minute brownies in 20…

    I am often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently.

    Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing. I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook 30-minute brownies in 20 minutes.

    Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

    I don't perspire.

    I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket.

    I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery.

    The laws of physics do not apply to me.

    I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down.

    I breed prize-winning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.

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