The Intern (The Intern, #1)

1.

Melons. The girls. Gazongas. I could rattle off every nickname in the world for my boobs — oops, nearly forgot jubblies — but it didn’t change the fact they were small. Embarrassingly small. Think grapes over melons, fun-size bags over fun bags, shot glasses over jugs.

Which was why I shouldn’t have been surprised when my boobs were the catalyst for squeals of laughter from my younger sister, Kat, on the eve of an important day. A Very Important Day.

‘Geez, put those puppies away,’ Kat smirked from my bedroom doorway. ‘Some of us haven’t had lunch yet and I’d hate to lose my appetite.’

I paused from rifling through piles of crumpled clothes on my bed. ‘What? I don’t know what you —’

‘Just look down,’ said Kat, tossing her jet-black ponytail. I hated when she did that.

Following her instructions, I looked down and saw my left nipple peeking out of my bra. ‘Argh!’ I yelped, yanking at the faded material. ‘Kat, get out! Get out!’

Kat cackled, then plonked onto my bed, squashing the heaving mass of clothes. Too tired to argue, I sat down next to her and double-checked that my boob hadn’t made another escape.

Kat fussed with her thick fringe. ‘So, found something to wear tomorrow, Jose?’

Broken shoes, stained shirts and fraying dresses burst from the wardrobe, spilling into an unwearable mess. A personal stylist would’ve come in handy to tell me why I shouldn’t tape my sneakers together instead of buying a new pair, and how to dress like a normal seventeen-almost-eighteen-year-old.

‘Yep. Well, maybe. Probably. No. I’m screwed. My sister just saw my boob and I’m screwed.’

Cursing, I lay back on the bed. Kat reapplied her lip gloss. It smelled of cherries, reminiscent of summery desserts.

‘Hey Jose?’ she said.

‘Yeah?’

‘I won’t tell anyone I saw your boob.’

‘Thanks.’

‘Well, except Tye,’ Kat added. ‘I tell him everything. You know, boyfriend rules and all that.’

I sighed. One of those melodramatic I-hate-my-life sighs, where the air rushed up from the depths of my stomach and exploded with a raging ‘whoosh’. But if Kat noticed, she didn’t show it.

‘Hey Jose?’ she said again.

‘Yeah?’

‘You’re going to have to look amazing tomorrow, you know?’

‘I know.’ I know. I know. I know.

‘Amaaaazing. Seriously, tomorrow’s important. Mum’s been yabbering to everyone about it.’

‘Heard you the first time.’

During the past few weeks, Kat had been firing off tips about the Very Important Day (I swear she was sixteen going on thirty sometimes). Wear this, don’t wear that, do this, don’t do that, say this, don’t say that. I knew she was trying to help me reduce the risk of embarrassing myself, but it only made me more panicked. You see, life loved handing me something amazing, only to backhand me almost straight after. It had always been that way. In Year Eight, moments after my first kiss, the delectable Pete Jordan vomited from food poisoning and hadn’t spoken to me since. At Year Ten presentation night, I was named ‘Most Likely To Succeed’, only to faceplant the ground as I walked back to my seat. Some moron recorded my historic fall, making me an overnight YouTube sensation. I won’t even go in to what happened at my Year Twelve formal, although it involved a spiked punch bowl, ninety rolls of toilet paper and a paddock of mud. I don’t know why I thought the next day — the Very Important Day — would be any different, but I was counting on a fairy-godmother-shaped miracle.

Most girls I knew, like Kat, spent their allowances or pay on make-up, jewellery, fashion, music, phone credit and magazines.

For me, magazines were a sparkly fantasy filled with smiling, shiny people who looked too happy all the time. That didn’t stop me from leafing through Kat’s magazines when she was out, but instead of checking out the fashion I was reading the feature stories, scoping out who wrote them and looking for spelling mistakes.

I’d studied hard at high school for six years because I was destined to be a news journalist at a newspaper or radio station. So it had come as a huge shock to everyone, including me, to discover I would be interning at a magazine as part of my uni degree’s second semester. And not just any magazine. I’d been signed up to (translation: pushed into) a one-day-a-week internship at one of the hottest women’s magazines in the country, Sash.

When I told Kat my news, she was thirteen per cent excited for me and eighty-seven per cent envious. In her world, my inability to use a curling iron meant I didn’t deserve the intern position. Her warning of ‘Don’t say anything stupid to the Sash girls and ruin my chances of working there one day’ hadn’t filled me with confidence. Unless I underwent the world’s first personality transplant between here and the city, I knew I’d find a way to put my foot in it.

Kat picked up a ratty floral dress from the top of the pile and threw it into the rubbish bin near my desk.

‘Hey! What are you doing?’ I said. ‘I’ve had that for ages.’

‘Exactly,’ she shot back, rolling her blue eyes in a flurry of mascara, eyeliner and eye shadow. ‘Tomorrow you need to look hot and cool. You can’t wear your crappy old clothes at a place like that. Now, here’s what I’m thinking …’

I sighed and tuned out. I couldn’t handle another one of Kat’s pep talks where she criticised my worn-out sandals, mismatched socks, lack of bold lipstick, split ends and under-plucked brows.

‘… so come on, it’s makeover time. We’re getting our shop on,’ barked Kat, unaware that I’d been ignoring her rant.

‘I’ll sort it. Trust me.’

Grunting in disbelief, Kat held up a daggy blue skirt and waved it around. ‘This opportunity is wasted on you — and your small boobs!’

She threw the skirt back onto the bed and stormed out, her ponytail whipping behind her. I heard her bedroom door slam — twice, just in case I missed the first. I held the skirt up against my lower body and took in the reflection grimacing back at me. Mousy brown hair, scruffy but fine. Eyes, green and wide, easily my favourite feature. Eyebrows, semi-unruly but manageable. Lips, pouty and pink, no major complaints, but occasionally clownish. Nose, free from any wart-like protrusions, so doing okay. Boobs, small in size — obviously — but apparently confident enough to jump free of brassiere on a whim. Everything from the waist down blurred together: hips, thighs and legs were all … just there.

I gazed at the skirt. Sure, I’d owned it for five years, and it was a hand-me-down from my weird cousin Tracey, but it was all I had. I needed another opinion.

‘Mum, can you come here for a sec?’

Moments later, Mum appeared in the doorway, balancing an overflowing washing basket on one hip. Her shaggy brown hair was pulled into a loose bun at the nape of her neck and held with a rusty peg. A yellow daisy played peekaboo from behind her right ear. Mum loved plucking flowers from the garden and wearing them until they wilted. Her dress — another bargain from the op shop — had faded to a musky pink and clung to her body in all the wrong places. But none of these things detracted from her pretty features, which glowed without even a hint of foundation, blush or mascara.

‘Yes, love?’ she asked, readjusting the basket on her hip.

I held up the skirt. ‘How hideous is this? Would you say it’s send-me-home-to-change hideous or let-me-stay-but-bitch-about-me-behind-my-back hideous?’

Mum shrugged, then patted me on the shoulder. ‘Josephine Browning, you always look gorgeous.’

‘You have to say that.’

‘Not true. When you were a child you were chubby with enormous ears — reminded me of a baby elephant — and I was the first person to point that out.’

‘Mum!’

‘But I do like that skirt.’

‘Kat thinks I need a new outfit — new dress, heels, the works. You know, for tomorrow.’

‘Wait, is that my skirt? I thought I’d passed it on to your cousin Tracey. I should’ve hung onto it if it’s back in fashion, love.’

I forced a smile. Kat’s outburst about my lack of options suddenly didn’t seem so hysterical. It was time to admit defeat to the self-proclaimed fashion queen of the house, which ranked number two on my Things I Hate To Do List. (Number one: cross-country running.)

I knocked on Kat’s bedroom door with its ‘Stay Out’ sign sticky-taped above the doorknob. Rock music pounded from within and I imagined her writing in her diary about her ugly, frumpy, older sister. Either that, or sneaking out the window to meet up with Tye. I doubted she was dabbling in the rare option of cleaning her room, although when it came to Kat I could never be sure.

The door cracked open. ‘Whaddya want?’

‘Um, what were you saying about the shops?’

‘Not another word, I hear your unfashionable cries for help loud and clear,’ said Kat, scooping up a handbag from the floor and swinging it over her shoulder. ‘Get your wallet, Jose, because when we’re done you’re definitely going to need it.’

I looked like a tarted-up pageant queen. As I stared into the full-length mirror, all I could see were big green eyes, big pink mouth, big bold jewellery, big bright patterns and big high-heeled shoes. Everything was big, even the price tags. I smelled like a perfumery and my face itched from the foundation and bronzer caking my skin. Kat beamed, admiring her work. She’d taken me on a whirlwind tour of the department store, trialling makeup products at every counter. Before I could stop her, she called out to a saleswoman who was hovering nearby.

‘She looks amazing, right? Like, amazing,’ Kat said.

‘Oh yeah, amazing,’ gushed the woman, fuelled by the anticipation of a sale. ‘Hon, you should seriously get that whole outfit.’

I blushed, reminded of when Mum took me to buy my first bra in Year Six and invited the shop owner into the change room to admire my ‘growing buds’. Like Mum, Kat had the intuition of a dead caterpillar when it came to sensing my discomfort. I squeezed my wallet a little tighter as the saleswoman circled me, eyeing me up and down. She’d detected my fear the moment we’d walked into the store and I’d cried out, ‘Is that a belt or a skirt?’ Mentally, I double-locked my piggy bank and buried it in a safe three hundred metres below ground level, complete with security guards and CCTV cameras.

I snuck another peek in the mirror and cringed at the loud colours competing for my attention. The dress felt tight, but Kat was convinced it fitted perfectly. I had to admit, it was creating curves in places usually hidden by baggy T-shirts or baby-doll dresses.

To my right, a mannequin wearing the same outfit, down to the bright yellow peep-toes, was looking rather fashionable. ‘How do you do it?’ I muttered to her.

‘Okay, I’ll say it: this is the best you’ve ever looked,’ said Kat. ‘Wear this tomorrow and you’ll kill it. That dress is hot.’

‘Weren’t we aiming for hot and cool?’

Kat rolled her eyes. ‘Let’s not go crazy, Jose. It is you we’re talking about.’

The saleswoman cleared her throat. ‘So do you want to pay with cash or credit, hon?’

I ran through my wardrobe options at home one final time. A montage of outdated playsuits, daggy dresses and worn shoes danced in my mind, the blue skirt at the forefront. I had no choice: I was getting the outfit.

‘Cash, thanks.’

I handed over the crumpled notes. There was no turning back now.

2.

Magazine-shaped butterflies fluttering in my stomach woke me up on the big day. I filled an overnight bag with a change of clothes, Kat’s make-up case and a packed lunch. The plan was I’d stay at my cousin Tim’s place in the city the night before and after my internship day. This first time, however, I was going straight into the Sash office.

Mum came with me to the train station, and kept dragging me into hugs smelling of flowery cleaning products with a dash of cigarette smoke. She’d started smoking after Dad left and I was trying not to give her a hard time about it.

She squeezed me again. ‘Give it your best, love.’

I bit my lip to stop myself crying. Kat had done my hair, nails and make-up that morning and the last thing I wanted was mascara streaking down my face.

‘You’ll call me when you get there?’

‘Yes, Mum.’

I hated leaving her, even just for the night. She didn’t admit it, but I knew she was missing Dad. He’d walked out last November, so suddenly we’d almost missed it.

I’d come home early due to a free period to see him storming down the driveway, sunglasses on, wheeling two suitcases. His cricket bag was already in the back of the car, next to an esky. I’d shouted out ‘Hello’ but he didn’t turn around. To this day, I didn’t know whether he’d heard me or not. I’d convinced myself he hadn’t; that he was so caught up in his own thoughts they’d drowned me out.

When Mum got home from work I told her how Dad had driven off. She’d nodded, walked into her bedroom and closed the door behind her. She didn’t come out all night. I sat outside with my back against the door and my knees up to my chin listening to her sob for hours. Kat cried too, lying on the couch with her earphones in, tears streaming down her face.

The next day, Mum discovered Dad had taken a chunk of cash out of their joint account. In my mind, he’d become a raging gambler who’d disappeared to Vegas to spend our family money. But I didn’t know the truth and probably never would.

We hadn’t heard a peep from him since, except for a scrawled letter for Kat’s birthday.

Guilt nipped at my ankles for hopping on the train and heading off to the city, but Mum was the one who’d encouraged me to go for the internship. She wanted more for Kat and me. She always did.

‘Julie said Tim’s excited about your visit,’ she told me.

I smirked. Why did relatives always exaggerate the truth? Aunt Julie was Mum’s older sister, and her son, Tim, was twenty-two. I hadn’t seen him for four years and he probably couldn’t remember who I was. Last time we met I had braces and he was bragging about his bike and ducking classes to make out with his girlfriend. All I knew about him now was that he’d changed his uni degree four times and was letting me crash on his couch.

I nodded. ‘Great.’

‘You’ve got his number in your phone, haven’t you? Or just call me if you need anything. The city’s a big place, love, lots of weirdos.’

‘Mum!’

‘Actually, I’ll call you tonight. Or you call me. Or we’ll call each other. Let’s just call each other.’

‘Yes, Mum. Love you.’

Mum cuddled me close, then let go to blow her nose. ‘Go on now, you can do this,’ she said, half to me, half to herself.

She shooed me onto the train. I found a double seat, dumped my bag next to me and glanced through the window. It was impossible not to spot Mum on the platform with her wild, curly hair and even wilder outfit: a bright green muu-muu spattered with orange lilies. Moments later, the train purred to life and I strained my neck waving as we chugged away.

I settled back in my seat and watched the scenery whizz by, my mind racing just as fast with thoughts of the city. I was nervous and it wasn’t only because I was wearing my expensive new outfit. I could tell this was the beginning of something exciting.

I’d applied to intern at the best newspapers in the country, but those positions had gone to older students. My journalism lecturer, Professor John ‘Filly’ Fillsmore, had told me there were only two positions left: at Sash or Cats Quarterly. Even he couldn’t hide a grin while telling me about the Quarterly’s tea-sipping cuckoo readership. Apparently Sash had had a last-minute dropout, creating a spot for me. Filly used words like ‘exclusive’ and ‘highly sought after’ to describe the placement. I didn’t know the first thing about fashion or beauty, but I was determined to score a high distinction for the internship, even if I had to fake my way through twelve weeks at a magazine. I’d read about high-powered magazine editors climbing the ranks to successful careers in newspapers and television so I wasn’t completely put out. And I was happy to escape the kitty litter at Cats Quarterly.

But ever since I’d accepted the internship, my imagination had immersed me in graphic daydreams of what Sash magazine would be like. There’d be six-foot supermodels sipping cocktails, chiselled handymen fixing photocopiers, glamorous fashion writers giggling and flashing their company credit cards. Models, musicians and celebrities would hang out in hammocks in the office, while the staff tossed around creative ideas and took early marks to go shopping. Unlike me, everyone would have Proactiv-perfect skin, whitened teeth and a boyfriend who sent roses to the office. Above all these, my biggest worry was surviving a day in heels; I could barely stand up straight in ballet flats.

Shiny-haired glamazons swinging designer handbags and wearing killer heels dotted the city’s main street. The air was thick with the smell of coffee, bacon, perfume, bus exhaust fumes and cigarette smoke. City slickers lined up at fruit stalls, or mindlessly played with mobiles while walking along the footpath.

The crowd swallowed me up. I allowed myself to be swept past sushi shops and high-rise buildings, bumping people with my overnight bag and apologising when they glared at me. I also had a handbag bouncing off my right hip and a smaller tote holding my resumé and certificates.

Despite taking six wrong turns, I arrived at the Sash office early, so I took a seat inside a cafe across the road. I’d heard internships involved lots of coffee-fetching, and wondered if they expected me to remember their orders off by heart. I had visions of screaming girls clawing at me because I’d bought them a skim soy latte with no sugar instead of a rice milk tea with three sugars. A cute waiter wearing skinny jeans and a black tie interrupted my panicked thoughts.

‘Tea? Coffee? Hug?’

I looked up. ‘Pardon?’

‘Just kidding. What can I get you, doll face?’

I blushed redder than the lipstick Kat had ordered me to wear.

‘A water would be great, thanks.’

‘No worries,’ he replied. ‘You know, I haven’t seen you in here before.’

‘I guess I’m new.’

‘Oh yeah? What brings you here?’

Damn, I clearly wasn’t channelling my inner glamour enough yet. Maybe I needed more eye shadow.

‘A magazine internship.’

He nodded. ‘Nice. Funny, though, I thought magazines and newspapers were dying off? Isn’t new technology taking them down and all that?’

Stunned, I didn’t know how to reply. ‘Oh. I, ah, I …’

‘What would I know? I’m sure it’ll be great. I’ll go grab that water,’ the waiter said. ‘Have a great internship, Magazine.’

He walked off, humming, and I smiled at his little nickname. City people aren’t so bad, I thought. But then I saw the girls stalking into the building across the road. They looked scarily like the people in my daydreams: glamorous, slim, tall and modelesque. I imagined them chattering about their weekend spent on the family yacht or at a hot-people-only dinner party on Saturday night. ‘I only drink water fetched from a spring in Finland and blessed by a nun,’ one perfect-complexioned diner would titter to the other. ‘Did you happen to catch up with Brad, Angelina and the kids over the summer?’ her companion would reply. ‘We tried to, but you know what they’re like, all work, no play. Luckily George was free so he showed us the sights instead.’ I was so deep into my daydream that I almost didn’t notice when my water arrived (sadly, not from a fancy spring in Finland).

A quick glance at the clock on the cafe wall showed it was time to leave. I stood up and checked my reflection in the window. On a normal day, I had the bad habit of hunching over like Quasimodo reaching for a dropped coin. But today wasn’t a normal day. For a start, I was in heels. Expensive, probably-going-to-snap-my-ankle heels that made me taller than usual. I rolled my shoulders back, straightened my spine and tilted my chin upwards. You can do this, I told myself. You’re the most likely to succeed, remember? You blitzed school, you’re wearing a new dress and you’re destined to be a brilliant journalist. You. Can. Do. This.

I hoisted my bags over my shoulder, picked up my overnight bag and headed for the door. Milliseconds later, my heels slipped in a puddle of juice, sending me crashing to the floor. Everyone glanced around — my screech probably had something