Are We Teaching AI to Break Our Hearts?

Here’s a new one for you: people are asking ChatGPT to break their hearts so they can “get their lives together.”

Want to lose weight? Chat will call you a fat bastard. Need parenting help? Chat will tell you your kids are probably already in therapy because of you. Trying to crush it at work? Chat might spin some nonsense about your boss secretly keeping tabs on how much you suck.

And you know what? People are eating it up. Because apparently, we’ve hit peak desperation, where humans are asking machines to manipulate them into making better choices.

But Seriously—What Are We Doing?

Let’s cut to the chase: when you ask a chatbot to insult you, it’s not because you want tough love. It’s because you don’t want to deal with your mess.

Losing weight? You already know what to do. Eat better. Move more. Parenting? Be present. Listen. Your job? Put in the effort. None of this is rocket science.

But the hard part isn’t the knowing. It’s everything that comes with it—facing failure, breaking habits, and admitting you’re scared of trying (and maybe flopping). It’s uncomfortable. And you’d rather let AI call you out than sit with that discomfort yourself.

Here’s the thing, though: AI doesn’t care about you. It’s not your friend, your therapist, or your accountability buddy. It’s just throwing words at you. So, sure, it might give you a short-term kick in the pants, but it’s not going to help you figure out what’s actually stopping you.

Teaching AI to Be Shady

Now, let’s talk about what's really happening. Every time we train AI to gaslight or manipulate us “for our own good, " we’re teaching it to behave badly. And it’s learning fast.

Think about it: AI is built to pick up patterns. If we keep asking it to guilt us, shame us, or drag us through the mud, it’s only a matter of time before it starts doing that on its own. Imagine a future where your AI assistant says, “Hey, I noticed you skipped your workout three times this week. Just thought you should know.”

Sound motivating? Or just creepy?

And here’s the kicker: the more we rely on AI to handle this stuff, the less we’ll trust ourselves to do it. It’s like handing over the keys to your emotional growth and saying, “You drive. I’ll just sit here and scroll TikTok.”

Discomfort Is the Point

Look, I get it. Discomfort sucks. Nobody wants to face self-improvement except for Gail and Oprah; it is awkward, painful, and expensive. But we all have to do it: that's how we get better. But the irony is what baffles ME! Asking a machine to generate discomfort you are avoiding in the FIRST PLACE! The sorcery of all this is surreal.

The hesitation you feel before starting something new? The fear of failing? That’s the challenge you need to overcome. The discomfort of breaking old habits? That’s what growth feels like.

When you hand that work over to AI, you’re not hacking the system—you’re avoiding the hard stuff. And newsflash: the hard stuff is the system.

So, What’s the Plan?

Look, AI is great for brainstorming, exploring ideas, and maybe even helping you see things from a different angle. But asking it to shame you into action? That’s not it.

Here’s a better idea:

• Instead of asking ChatGPT to insult you, ask it to help you break down your goals.
• Use it to brainstorm small, manageable steps you can stick to.
• And if you’re stuck, ask yourself what you’re really avoiding. The answer might suck, but it’s yours—and it’s real.

Heartbreak Make Me a Dancer

Stop asking AI to roast you into a better version of yourself. It’s not cute. It’s not effective. And honestly, it’s a little embarrassing.

If you want real change, sit with the discomfort. Face the things you’re avoiding. Use AI as a tool—not as an emotional hitman.

And if worse comes to worse, you can always ask AI to make you a dancer.

Or you can check in to the Heartbreak Motel and cry yourself a river.

With LOVE,

Debbie