Soul Rolling, Micro-Blessings, A Spectrum of Possibilities, Ugly Grandkids

“Whenever you feel like criticizing any one...just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”

— F. Scott Fitzgerald

6:30 a.m., Thanksgiving morning, I’m up, alone, the rest of the house is asleep, my Queen, Cousin, and Parker Van Halen are all enjoying a little later wake time, I slept well, but it’s time for this soul to roll.

The world lost a couple of amazing souls this past week. One of the women that helped raise me, Kathy Hammer, passed. She was suffering; it was a blessing, but still a severe loss for our family and community. Tom McCarthy, a friend, and client for years, should not go without a mention.  He was a good father, grandfather, and involved in his community; they both left the world a little better than when they arrived.

I received many emails this week about folks being thankful; it “tis” the season; I think this year, this hard pause of life has been unique but has shown a light on how blessed many of us are these days.  Blessings come in many forms; as of writing these words, my Mane Coon cat Tee Tee has decided to sit on my lap, purring; she’s a gift to me.

Another gift sits to my right, my cup of coffee, intense, dark, rich, my fuel in the morning to get my mind and body active.  My wine glass from last night still sits where I left it; wine is a blessing at night.  The place I sit, a large 6-foot purple bean bag, has served as my writing perch for the last two years; it will continue to serve this purpose for the foreseeable future.

I guess these are micro blessings; I could go macro, but I think for today, I’ll stay with the little things; it’s time to get small, if only for a while. For those reading these words in the future, first thank you, not sure how you found these old texts, but your interest is intriguing. We are in the middle of a pandemic; we have been asked to stay home, only go out if it’s a necessity; some of the population follows the rules; others do not.

We have been told to stay in our homes this holiday season.  Don’t go out and connect with others; some say when at your residence, wear a mask. We will be heading over to our neighbor’s house; we have three here, they have four there, our families are all back east, this is our western family. We will dine and drink and celebrate this particular time in history.

Tomorrow we will pack the rest of our belongings in the basement; the contractors arrive Monday to demo our home; I forgot how moving is such a pain in the ass. But it will be worth it; coming back home next year to a new home will be, wait for it, a blessing. The sunrise this morning is a gift from something larger than ourselves. This daily gift is unwrapped with my laptop, coffee, and inspires me to appreciate the life I have been given.  

We are all given life, but what we choose to do with it becomes a spectrum of possibilities.  I’m about a third through the book by John Ortberg – If you want to walk on water, you must get out of the boat! Thank you again, Deb, for the recommendation, a challenge to one’s status quo.

As I read the words of Mr. Ortberg, a few questions struck me. The first; What is your most painful limitation? Next; What is the limitation that frightens you most to acknowledge and accept? Finally; What do I enjoy doing for its own sake?

I thought about these questions; my initial thought was my most significant limitation in life is my comfortable existence. I think back to when I had nothing when I was poor.  The work I poured in, the drive, the grinding nature of my young self.  The work paid off, I’m now in a desirable spot, but I’ve lost that aggressive nature of my youth. My laissez-faire mindset needs to be adjusted.  

That limitation troubles me; I am happy with my existence, maybe too optimistic, but I do get a charge from working with our younger team members. Yesterday I was able to help one of our younger members make some moves to move a deal forward. The conversation and subsequent events gave me energy.

What do I enjoy doing for its own sake? Well, this thing I’m doing right now, writing is something that gives me joy. I don’t know why I feel compelled to write words making word soup for people I do not know. I think that my work these days is a foundation for something bigger; I do not know what that is, maybe a novel, perhaps a movie, time will tell why I am doing this “art?”  I do not know, but I can tell you a day without this “mind cleansing” is not a good day. 

At this point, you might be thinking, who is this pompous ass. Sorry, humility is something I am working on, but I’m a proud man with a good string of base hits and a few home runs in my life. At my age, I’m learning to lean in, enjoy, be thankful, if you will, for the experience I have been given. I am aware of my limitations and will continue working on those things that cause me to pause.

My children are all successful; my grandbaby is the most beautiful soul bore on earth since time began, and my parents are still alive and kicking at 81.  My Queen gives me more love than I deserve, and my work team is a group of folks that do epic shit.  

One thought, our grandkid is so beautiful; what if the rest of the grandkids are not as beautiful? What if we get a batch of ugly babies? Would we know? Would anyone mention, “yeah, that first one was awesome, but the rest of them are turds?”  Sorry -little humor to end this soup. I hope your sense of humor is alive and kicking this holiday during a pandemic. I hope you spend time with those you love, even if you are not connected via blood.  We are all family here on this spinning blue ball—a toast to humanity from a perceived pompous ass.

“Whenever you feel like criticizing any one...just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”

— F. Scott Fitzgerald