Role Model Mindset: Leading by Example in Law and Life

Welcome to Law Life

In this week's article, I want to explore the transformative power of adopting what Brendon Burchard calls the "role model mindset." Every morning, as part of my daily affirmations and statements to myself, when journaling, I remind myself that I want to be a role model for Madison and Mason, students interested in law, lawyers, and drug and alcohol counselors. Reminding ourselves of these frameworks in the face of relentless distractions is important.

The Journey to Role Model Mindset

As I have talked about in my TEDx talk and recently in my NJSBA talk on attorney wellness, during COVID-19, I realized I had neglected important parts of my life when trying to become the best trial lawyer I could be. Through a transformational night in San Diego with Ed Mylett and then immersing myself in Ed's podcast, I discovered Brendon Burchard—though at the time, I had no idea about his background training Oprah's leadership team, his high-performance planner, or his numerous bestselling books.

His passionate discussion about the responsibility we all have to be role models, especially during challenging times caught my attention.

In those uncertain times, his message remains important and relevant.

He said, "Role model mindset means I realize that as I'm going to endure difficulty in life, the kids are watching, my friends, my family. Others are observing and being influenced by me. There's a contagion out there, but there's also an emotional contagion out there. Let me be that role model in showing people how to deal with things with perspective, with being centered amid the storm, with the strength of intention to say, you know what? I know this is going to be hard so let me take care of myself and let me be kind to other people. When we determine ourselves to be a role model, we really change our behavior. We say, you know what? Two things happen. One, I want to be a role model because three months from now, six months from now, a year, when we look back, I want to be proud of my behavior and my character during this time. Please let me be proud of how I endured difficulty in my life. That requires intention for how you want to endure difficulty."

From Personal Growth to Community Impact

This message resonated deeply because it aligned with what I was experiencing in my own life. As a husband, father, law firm partner, and member of the legal community, I realized that every action, decision, and response I make creates a template for others. Whether we choose it or not, we're all role models—the only question is: what kind of example are we setting?

Daily Practice of Leadership

Being a role model isn't about perfection but intention and awareness. It's about recognizing that our attitudes and approaches to challenges influence our lives and ripple out to affect our families, teams, and the broader legal community. This awareness has transformed how I approach each day, from my morning journaling practice to handling difficult situations in court or with clients.

The Power of Vulnerability

One of the most important aspects of being a role model is the willingness to be vulnerable—to share our successes, struggles, and lessons we've learned along the way. This is why I continue to speak about Attorny Wellness and share my experiences through Law Life and various speaking engagements.

Exciting News: NJSBA Attorney Wellness Series Continues

I'm thrilled to announce we have scheduled Part 2 of my Attorney Wellness series with the New Jersey State Bar Association on January 9, 2025, at noon via Zoom. This free event for NJSBA members will build upon our November discussion, though new attendees are warmly welcomed and encouraged to join.

As we begin 2025, I'll explore setting meaningful goals and habits that stick while maintaining wellness in your legal practice. I'll introduce the "Rails, Rocks, and Blocks" framework for sustainable success.

I intend to cover:

1. Understanding the "Rails, Rocks, and Blocks" approach to goal setting

2. Bringing awareness to what is important (Rails 1111) instead of distractions

3. Setting sustainable habits

4. Building wellness practices into your daily routine

5. Implementing strategies that support long-term success and well-being

Law Life Journal: A Community-Driven Resource

I'm excited to share that I have begun collecting input from the legal community about the most effective morning and evening journal prompts for a Law Life Journal I am creating.

These crowd-sourced questions will be incorporated into the Law Life Planner, making it a collaborative tool designed by and for legal professionals.

Your experience and insights matter. What questions do you ask yourself to stay focused and aligned with your goals? What prompts help you maintain wellness while managing the demands of legal practice?

Please select your favorite variations of a series of morning and evening prompts that will be part of daily journaling in the Law Life planner- I hope to share the results of the prompts at the upcoming NJSBA talk on January 9th- you can participate in the process at https://bit.ly/lawlifeprompts.

The Impact of Intentional Leadership

When we consciously adopt a role model mindset, we create a ripple effect that influences our entire professional ecosystem. Our team members observe how we handle pressure and challenges. Our clients notice how we maintain composure during difficult situations. Our families see how we balance professional demands with personal well-being.

As legal professionals, we have a unique opportunity—and responsibility—to model ethical behavior, professional excellence, and personal growth. This becomes especially important when dealing with challenging cases or demanding clients. Our example can show others how to maintain composure, integrity, and professionalism even under pressure.

The Power of Service

Our greatest fulfillment as legal professionals often flows from serving others. Each client represents more than just a case—they represent an opportunity to make a meaningful difference in someone's life. When we approach our work with this mindset, viewing each matter as a chance to help others through difficult times, we find a deeper purpose in our practice. This service-oriented approach naturally aligns with being a role model, demonstrating to others how to lead with compassion, integrity, and dedication while positively impacting our communities.

This Week's Resources

🔗 My TEDx Talk - "Following My Inner Counsel and Reclaiming Time"

🔗 Brendon Burchard on The Ed Mylett Show - "The Role Model Mindset"

🔗 Register for the January 9th NJSBA Attorney Wellness Seminar- Register here: Not Available Yet

🔗 Provide your input for the Law Life Journal Prompts Here

Engage with Law Life

I hope this discussion of the role model mindset inspires you to consider your influence and the example you're setting in your professional and personal life. If you found this helpful, please share it with colleagues who might benefit from these insights. Every like, comment, and share helps get the Attorney Wellness message out, and it can be a post or message that changes lives.

Thank you for reading this far! I appreciate you. Remember—we're all role models, whether we choose it or not. The only question is: what kind of example are we setting? Keep up the Momentum 🚀

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• Resilience and Discipline: Lessons from My High School Wrestling Journey

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• Attorney Wellness: Understanding and Addressing the Crisis in Our Profession

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