Horn OK Please!

I embraced Bangalore in 2013 and hey! I am a loyalist, the weather is great, good food, cuisines to match every palate, using my Telugu skills turning almost ever Kannada auto driver's frown to a smile in minutes, more recently a world class airport, even though I'm on the road mostly and I love the traffic! I (legit) enjoy my longgg commute to work, listen to music, finish quick calls, enjoy the bumpy ride sometimes my shuffle reading the situation and playing music to adjust the tempo to match the potholes, the universe does conspire to get things in your favor truly! even though my L5-S1 bulged disc has a mixed opinion.. 🙄

Ever wonder how we talk about reaching a place in Bangalore? Always in time, not in distance. Best conversations ever!

“Hey! I just crossed the traffic at KR Puram, will reach Phoenix Mall in 45-50 mins tops" and that’s 5.3 kms, time we are never getting back!

Our favorite conversations are about traffic, sipping our delicious filter kaapi, we quip, “Hey, that KR Puram junction is terrible man!” the other chimes in “Dude, that’s nothing, I have to cross 3 such junctions to get to work from Silk Board!”, "Oh! that's nothing, today I spent half hour outside my society gate, so much traffic! " rattling off our routine traffic adventures each trying to outdo the other.

My aunt who lives in Electronic City, comes visits me in Hebbal in the same frequency as my sister who lives in a different country, one needs a visa and the other needs to cross tolls. When we fly out of Bangalore, we are programmed to take early flights out and late flights in and yes, we wake up before the alarm! If not anything, Bangalore teaches you discipline. The silver lining! :)

Each week, just as we think we have understood the pattern, we are stumped with rain, ethnic days, pizza Friday's, some random meeting we have to show up to so that we nod our heads and say "Thank you's" at and many random reasons we didn't see coming!

Word to the Wise: Avoid the mad rush, leave home at 7:30 am (even 2 mins make a difference!) and log off work at 4 pm (no later), chances are you SHOULD beat traffic and make it home in 1.5 hours instead of 2.5-3 hours and I guarantee that you will NOT make it the “Top 3 employees” in the Wall of Fame while you also kiss your “Mom/ Dad of the year” award goodbye!

But there is still a tiny ray of hope, we would one day get recognition as regular commuters in not-so-organized-traffic in the “age of AI” residing in the "Silicon Valley of India, with the worst infrastructure to match the exponential growth potential” somwhere in fine print on a popular article which is like that Benne on your dosa! I say it’s a win! :)

If not, you know what they say in fancy words when you don’t have anything left to say because “Swalpa Adjust Maadi” is just cliché, I would resort to something classy in German, but let me try this instead, “C’est la vie!” :)