To grant trust or to withold...

One of the most profound things said to me in my career, words that instantly changed the way I thought and behaved; "Luke, people in our company shouldn't need to earn trust, we should just grant it. Imagine how more productive our business would be if we didn't waste time making people earn trust!” Despite this compelling logic, the question remains - why do we make people with whom we work earn our trust?

I have asked many people this question and the consensus appears to be the belief it’s not easy to grant trust. That, for some reason humans are coded to get to know someone before trusting them. And, in certain contexts, I agree. We do tend to hold our cards until the motives and intentions of a new colleague are known. We often withhold ideas until a certain point in the relationship has been reached where we feel comfortable with sharing. This is normal, right? Natural? Yes, it can be normal and natural, but granting trust to another you have just met is easier than you think. We do it every day!

When we catch a bus, we are instantly putting our trust in the driver. When we visit a new doctor, dentist or hairdresser, trust is granted. Every time we hop into a car we are trusting the other drivers around us to obey the road rules and drive sensibly. So, trust is constantly being granted. What then, is at the heart of this tendency to grant trust in some contexts but not all?

Whilst the reason is complex and multi-dimensional, two individual attributes really matter - competence and character. If you believe someone has these, then trusting becomes easy. You can however, also trust if only one attribute is in play as I will explain in the following.

The above examples highlight how easy it can be to trust based on competence alone. We assume the driver, doctor and dentist are competent, character does not necessarily come into it (because we have not had time to get to know them). When it comes to the workplace, how are you able to trust that your newly minted team member is competent? Trust in this context comes down to one key belief: the belief that the recruitment process has done its job and someone with the right skills, knowledge, experience and temperament has arrived in your team. Like all beliefs, they derive from the choices we make. We can choose to believe the recruitment process is flawed, in which case we will look for evidence to confirm this belief and consequently spend a lot of time making the person prove themselves. This can often lead to ongoing relationship issues but, critically, will ALWAYS RESULT IN REDUCED PRODUCTIVITY (and increased opportunity or hard dollar financial costs)! Therefore, choosing to believe the recruitment process has worked as intended will have a direct impact on the bottom line.

What about character then? Character does take time to determine and as such can be more difficult to assume. A common mistake is not trusting someone because you don’t like them. It’s important to know that character is independent of likeability. Meaning you may not like someone but can still trust them. We have all worked with people we don’t like but still trust. Generally because of their character, which is more objective whereas likeability is very subjective. Character is something that most people would agree: he is hardworking, punctual, resilient, diligent. Likeable though? A different story. We tend to like people with whom we share common interests, traits and backgrounds which is highly individual and can vary significantly from person to person. The trap is that we can confuse our dislike for someone with their character which inadvertently impacts the level of trust. In this scenario, what can you do to maintain trust despite not liking the person? Internal dialogue telling yourself the person is of sound character is one way to keep on the trust path. Reminding yourself you don’t need to like someone to trust them is another. If the person does something that does not sit well with you, for whatever reason, repeat in your mind that they are of sound character and the thing you have noticed does not define them. Ultimately, ensuring you don’t confuse character with likeability is the goal so as you can continue to grant trust and in turn, as the rules of reciprocity show, have it returned in kind.

Try to grant trust next time you meet someone for the first time, particularly if they are a new member of your team. Assume the competence, assume the character and where necessary engage in positive self-talk so you can extend the trust and keep it there. Granting trust not only makes for a better workplace, it makes for a better you….