Finding Light When the Tunnel Feels Endless: Managing Stress in the Dark

Welcome to your Heal with EQ Weekly Digest!

Each day, we'll focus on practical tools, reflections, and stories to help you shift from perfectionism to self-acceptance and emotional freedom. If you'd like to dive deeper into my personal anecdotes, healing stories, and practical tools to help you Heal with EQ, check out this week's edition here, where I share my raw reflections on managing overwhelming stress and finding my way out of rock bottom.

I often find myself in a heated discussion between my heart, which yearns to share endlessly, and my mind, which strives for focus and simplicity. After careful consideration, I've decided to offer a streamlined version of our Heal with EQ newsletter on LinkedIn. You can follow my newest LinkedIn page, Heal with EQ page, where I'll share daily bite-sized inspiration and educational content to support your emotional healing journey.

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Monday: Moonlight Motivation 🌙

Theme: Managing Stress When Life Feels Darkest

So many of us are managing both visible and invisible stressors. The visible stress of poor work-life balance, trying to be everything to everyone. The invisible stress of constant performance anxiety or the fear of not measuring up.

I know what it feels like to shoulder constant stress—to stand in strength yet feel depleted by the weight of the world we carry on our shoulders.

Monday is all about the moon, reflecting what is hidden beneath the surface: our emotions.

In this video, I share my story of how I managed the overwhelming stress during one of the darkest periods of my life.

<< Watch Full Video Here >>

Tuesday: Mars in Motion 🔥

Theme: Slow Down to Speed Up

Mars, the planet of action and go-getter energy, rules our Tuesday. One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned about managing stress is this: sometimes you need to slow down in order to speed up.

At first, this might feel like the opposite of Mars' fiery, fast-paced energy. But as Denzel Washington wisely said:

“Just because you are doing a lot more doesn’t mean you are getting a lot done.”

Slowing down doesn’t mean stopping—it means pausing to realign, reflect, and refocus. This way, when you move forward, you’ll do so with clarity and purpose, multiplying your momentum.

Reflection Prompt:

In what area of your life do you feel the most stressed? How can you slow down to uncover the root cause, heal your stress, and harness the energy of Mars to speed up tenfold?

Wednesday: Mercury’s Wisdom 💬

Theme: Notes from the Future

Wednesday is ruled by Mercury, the planet of communication, inviting us to reflect on the conversations we have with ourselves. One of the most transformative tools I’ve used to build resilience is connecting with my Future Self.

I close my eyes and imagine the version of me who has overcome the challenge I’m facing. I ask her:

What wisdom can you share with me? What steps did you take to move forward?

Her answers often become my guiding light—a reminder that resilience is already within me, waiting to unfold.

This Wednesday, I shared Notes from the Future to help you navigate and overcome stress during times of adversity. These notes serve as a bridge between where you are now and the person you are becoming—someone stronger, wiser, and more at peace.

What advice do you imagine your Future Self would give you today?

Share in the comments below—we’re all walking this journey together. 💙

<< Watch Full Video Here >>

Hey, you. I see you.

I see you carrying the weight of stress day in and day out.

The kind no one notices—the kind that lives in your mind.

When you lie in bed, your thoughts refuse to rest:

"I could have done better today."

"I wish I hadn’t said that."

"I wish I had spent more time with my kids, but someone has to pay the bills."

"I need to be more present, but the screen is draining me—and I can’t stop checking my emails."

How did I get here? My life feels like a mess.

I don’t even know where to begin to make things right.

I’m scared of what tomorrow will bring—more problems I can’t fix alone.

I’m so tired of the speed, the stress, the suffering.

If only you could see yourself the way I see you.

You’re so hard on yourself. It’s a habit you picked up long ago,

when you were told—directly or indirectly—that you weren’t enough.

You worry too much, always bracing for the next shoe to drop.

You focus on the cup half empty and miss the good that’s already there.

My dear, let go of the worry—it only feeds your stress.

It’s okay to care.

It’s okay to wish you’d done better today.

It’s okay to not have it all figured out.

It’s okay to rest—to drop the weight from your shoulders

when you lay your head on the pillow.

It’s okay to slow down.

To listen to your heart and what it’s quietly trying to say.

Your mind is a master at keeping you busy—

with endless thoughts, endless lists, endless distractions.

But so much of it won’t matter in the end.

When you look back on your life, remember this:

You have a 100% track record of surviving every single one of your worst days.

Everything always works out in the end.

Let go. Let life flow. Let God.

And as I write this to you from the future,

I promise you—our life is unrecognizable.

We surrendered to life and embraced the ebb and flow of being human.

We turned fear into faith. Stress into strength.

Everything changed in ways we never expected—

beautiful ways.

You’re more capable than you give yourself credit for.

You’re stronger than you think.

You are not built to break.

You are a force of nature.

Let go of your worries.

The magic lies in the work you’re avoiding.

Take that next step—with confidence and faith.

You are not alone.

With love,

Your Future Self

Thursday: Jupiter’s Growth 🌱

Theme: Energy Flows Where Attention Goes

Transform Deep Adversity into Strength with the ABCDE Technique

When life feels heavy with deep adversity, it’s easy for stress to consume us. Albert Ellis’s ABCDE technique is a transformative tool to help navigate these challenging moments. It empowers us to challenge the beliefs that amplify our pain and reframe our perspective to move forward with strength and clarity.

Thursday is ruled by Jupiter, an expansive planet. Whatever we focus on grows larger. Our thoughts can be either our biggest obstacles or our greatest fuel in life. Learning to reframe them unlocks immense potential, helping us overcome life's challenges and reduce the stress that comes from living in survival mode.

Let’s explore how to apply it when stress stems from life’s most profound challenges.

A – Activating Event

The first step is identifying the Activating Event—the adversity or life challenge that triggers overwhelming stress. This could be losing a job, facing a health crisis, or experiencing financial hardship.

Example: "I’m on the verge of financial ruin, and I don’t know how I’ll provide for my family."

What to do: Write down what happened. Stick to the facts without layering on judgments or assumptions.

B – Beliefs

Next, examine the Beliefs you hold about the event. These are the automatic thoughts that often fuel despair, hopelessness, or guilt.

Example: "I’m a failure. I’ll never recover from this. I’m letting everyone down."

What to do: Write down these beliefs as honestly as possible, even if they feel harsh or irrational. Acknowledge the stories you’re telling yourself.

C – Consequences

Identify the Consequences of these beliefs. How are they affecting your emotions and actions? Often, these beliefs deepen feelings of hopelessness and keep us stuck.

Example:

• Emotional: "I feel defeated, ashamed, and paralyzed."

• Behavioural: "I avoid asking for help or seeking solutions because I believe nothing will change."

What to do: Reflect on how these beliefs are shaping your emotional state and preventing you from moving forward.

D – Dispute

Now comes the critical step: Dispute the beliefs that are keeping you trapped. Ask yourself:

• Is this belief absolutely true?

• What evidence supports or contradicts this belief?

• What alternative perspective could I take?

• How would I support a loved one in this situation?

Example:

Disputed Belief: "I’ve faced hard times before and survived. This doesn’t define my worth. I’m not a failure—I’m someone who is trying their best in an impossible situation."

What to do: Replace your original beliefs with compassionate, empowering truths. Remind yourself that this challenge doesn’t define you—it’s a chapter, not your entire story.

E – Effect

Finally, notice the Effect of reframing your beliefs. How does it shift your emotional state and help you take action?

Example:

• Emotional: "I feel less ashamed and more determined to take small steps toward change."

• Behavioural: "I reach out to someone I trust for support or explore resources to improve my situation."

What to do: Reflect on how this shift opens up possibilities for growth, healing, and resilience, even in the face of adversity.

Applying the ABCDE Technique in Times of Deep Stress

When life’s challenges feel insurmountable, the ABCDE technique helps break the cycle of despair:

1. Identify the challenge. Recognize the activating event without judgment.

2. Challenge your beliefs. Replace self-defeating narratives with compassionate truths.

3. Shift your response. Use reframed beliefs to take intentional, empowering actions.

Remember:

You are not your struggles. Even in the darkest moments, you have the power to change the story you tell yourself.

This isn’t about denying pain—it’s about discovering the strength within you to face it, transform it, and rise above it. Life’s deepest adversities can become the seeds of your greatest growth.

You’ve survived every challenge up until now. You’ll survive this, too.

Friday: Venus Friday 💖

Theme: Love Fuels Faith, Not Fear

Friday is ruled by Venus, the planet of love. And before you roll your eyes, let me clarify: love isn’t just romantic. Lust is romantic, emotional attachment is romantic, and intimacy with someone is romantic.

But love? Love is a state of being.

It’s a feeling that helps us turn fear into faith, guiding us through life’s darkest moments—not by sight, but by heart.

Love has always, always carried me out of life’s dens. Fear, on the other hand, keeps us stuck, as our mind amplifies worries and anxieties. But love—pure, unconditional love—diffuses fear. It calms the storm and reminds us to move forward with faith, knowing that everything always works out in the end.

This Friday, I’m sharing a poem written from my heart to a previous version of myself. My hope is that it will inspire someone who can relate and needs to hear this message.

<< Watch Full Video Here >>

Growing up, we watched our parents carry the weight of worry.

Worrying about how to put food on the table.

Worrying about not having enough.

Worrying about what may or may not come.

Worrying about us—if we’d be okay.

Worrying about life, with all its ups and downs.

We learned, without realizing it, that fear was a constant.

We developed a habit of fear and stress—because that was all we knew.

But what if our parents did the best they could,

with what they had, in the moments they had?

What if their worry came from love,

from a desire to give us the best life possible?

What if they, too, were taught by their parents to live this way?

What if the worry and fear were never really theirs—or ours—to carry?

We can’t change the past, but we can change how we see it.

What if life didn’t happen to us, but for us?

In this very moment, we can decide:

to turn fear into faith,

and worry into care.

We are more powerful and capable than we give ourselves credit for.

If only we remembered the power within our hearts,

our minds would focus on possibilities instead of limitations.

If only we understood that suffering is the hardest path

to a life free from fear.

So why not live with our hearts at the forefront?

The mind was never designed to carry the burden of worry and fear.

Remember this:

You can’t change the past—it’s already written.

You can’t control the future—it hasn’t arrived.

But you can be present, fully alive in each moment.

From that space, stress transforms into strength.

You decide, moment by moment.

Because energy flows where attention goes.

Saturday: Saturn’s Shield 🛡

Theme: Boundaries are Bridges to your Well-Being

Saturn teaches us discipline and responsibility, and when it comes to emotional well-being, boundaries are the ultimate form of self-respect.

A boundary is not a wall; it’s a bridge.

It’s a way to protect your energy while staying connected to the people and things that matter.

Here’s a simple boundary-setting practice:

1. Pause: When something feels off, take a moment to reflect on how it affects you.

2. Clarify: Ask yourself, “What do I need to feel safe, respected, or supported in this situation?”

3. Communicate: Express your needs calmly and assertively. Use “I” statements like, “I need some quiet time to recharge this evening.”

Remember, boundaries are about honouring yourself without guilt. Saying no to what drains you is saying yes to what nourishes you.

Today, reflect on one area of your life where a boundary could bring more balance. Then, take one small step toward setting it.

You are worthy of peace, and boundaries are the bridge to get there. 💛

#SaturnSaturday #BoundariesMatter #ThriveWithEQ #HealwithEQ

Sunday: Solar Shine ☀️

Theme: Shine with and without the Sun

“Stars can’t shine without darkness.”

When life feels overwhelming, take your EQ Vitamins to build resilience, restore inner peace, and rediscover the light within. These reminders are here to help you navigate through the shadows, reconnect with your strength, and take one step closer to healing.

1. Self-Perception

"Rediscover Your Inner Spark”

It’s easy to forget your worth when life feels heavy, but your value isn’t tied to the struggles you’re facing—it’s rooted in who you are.

EQ Vitamin: Take a moment to list three qualities you love about yourself. It might feel hard at first, but even the smallest recognition of your strengths can reignite your confidence.

Affirmation: I am worthy, resilient, and enough exactly as I am.

Today’s EQ Vitamin is a reminder that your value isn’t diminished by your circumstances. You are a light, even when the world feels dark.

#EmotionalIntelligence #EQOasis #HealWithEQ #InnerStrength

2. Self-Expression

"Speak Your Heart, Free Your Soul”

When we keep everything bottled up inside, the weight becomes unbearable. Sharing your truth—even if it’s only with yourself—creates space for healing.

EQ Vitamin: Write a letter to yourself or someone you trust, letting out everything you’re holding in. You don’t need to edit or overthink; just let your feelings flow.

Affirmation: My voice deserves to be heard, and my feelings are valid.

Today’s EQ Vitamin is a reminder to release what’s weighing on your heart. Speaking your truth doesn’t make you weak—it makes you free.

#EmotionalIntelligence #EQOasis #HealWithEQ #SpeakYourTruth

3. Interpersonal Relations

"Lean on Love, Build Your Bridges”

Dark times often make us retreat inward, but connection is a powerful antidote to isolation.

EQ Vitamin: Reach out to someone you trust, even if it’s just to say, “I’m thinking of you.” Genuine connection often starts with the simplest gestures.

Affirmation: I am surrounded by love and support, even when I cannot always see it.

Today’s EQ Vitamin is a reminder that you don’t have to walk through the darkness alone. Let the people who care about you hold the lantern when your hands feel too tired.

#EmotionalIntelligence #EQOasis #HealWithEQ #ConnectionHeals

For more EQ Vitamins, consider subscribing to our Heal with EQ Newsletter here.

Looking Ahead & Stay Connected

Next week, I’ll share my journey with loneliness during the holidays and how I’ve navigated the heaviness of feeling disconnected while the world seems to celebrate.

For now, I’d love to hear from you about stress—a theme many of us relate to during these challenging times.

How do you navigate stress when life feels overwhelming? What has worked for you, and what hasn’t? Share your experiences in the comments. Your story could be the encouragement someone else needs to keep going.

Remember, no matter how heavy it feels, you have the strength to rise.

With love & gratitude,

Nadja 💙 💜 💗

P.S. If this resonates, share it with someone who needs to know they are more than enough too.

P.S.S If you are ready to dive in deeper...

• 6-Day Inner Peace Challenge: Begin your journey to inner calm by building a strong foundation that starts within. Learn more.

• Subscribe to the EQ Oasis Newsletter: Every Saturday, I share raw reflections, healing stories and practical guidance to help you heal the past, embrace the present and build a better, brighter tomorrow.

• Join the EQ Oasis Community: If you are ready to dive in deeper, consider joining the Heal with EQ Community. A healing Oasis to heal your past, embrace your present and build a better, brighter tomorrow. Join the Waiting List.

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