Pauline Crawford PHD’s Post

To kya hua jo badla wo Jo kehta tha yahi, Badal bhi jaye duniya Main rahunga bs wahi :) Think about how often we’re told, directly or indirectly, that who we are isn’t actually right. From childhood, we learn to mold ourselves into versions that fit others' expectations. We spend so much of our lives adjusting. We shape-shift, we bend, we stretch ourselves thin to meet people halfway, to keep them around, to make them stay. We’re taught, in subtle and overt ways, that being ourselves isn’t enough. So we perform. We smile a bit more, laugh a bit louder, speak a little softer. We edit parts of our personality, downplay the sides that might be “too much” or “too little” and highlight the ones we think will make us more likable. We start to believe that we have to earn love, earn friendship, earn belonging by constantly proving that we’re worth it. And while we’re busy performing, hoping someone will choose us, we lose the very essence of who we are :/ Imagine yourself as a tree, standing tall and grounded, with branches reaching out and roots digging deep into the earth. Some people will walk by, see you for a moment, and move on, looking for a different tree. Others will come, sit under your shade for a while, enjoy the peace, and then leave when they’re ready. But then, there will be those few - those who’ll see something in you that resonates with them on a level beyond words. They’ll come back, again and again, until one day you realize they’re not visitors anymore. They’ve become a part of your landscape. It’s beautiful, isn’t it? To know that if you’re simply yourself, the people who are truly meant to be in your life will find their way to you, and they will stay. You won’t have to convince them, or adjust for them, or exhaust yourself trying to keep them around. They’ll stay not because of what you do or say, but because of who you are 🫂 Of course, not everyone will stay. Some people will walk away, some will drift, some will come and go like the changing seasons. And it will hurt sometimes, that sense of loss, that sting of rejection. But it’s in those moments that you must remind yourself of the truth in these words: if you have to change yourself to keep someone, then they aren’t truly yours. Their absence makes space for those who will value the real you, who will choose to stay not despite your flaws but because of them 🤌🏻 Those who are truly yours will always find their way to you, and they will stay, not for what you pretend to be, but for everything you already are 🤍🧿✨ Mayank Agarwal

Knowing Someone Vs Understanding Someone I have many friends, yet only a handful truly understand me. This isn't to say that those who don't fully grasp my thoughts aren't my friends, but rather, there are just a few who comprehend me completely, word for word. Therefore, knowing someone and understanding someone are two different terms. What are the most important elements for someone to move from the 'level of knowing' to the 'level of understanding'? I'd like to share my viewpoint here with all of you. 1.) Humans frequently express themselves through a range of emotions that vary according to the situation at hand. I'm not discussing feelings such as sadness, happiness, annoyance, and excitement. Deep-seated emotions such as feeling exploited, isolated, discriminated against, betrayed, punished for others' errors, and treated unequally are significant concerns. These emotions are not often shared publicly by everyone. We always have our close-knit circle who not only know us but also understand us well. 2.) I'm aware of someone who was in a committed relationship for years, yet abruptly ended it due to their family's disapproval. I was closely acquainted with the partner who was deeply hurt; she confided her profound emotions in me, and it's indescribable what she went through. No one should ever feel like they were treated as an object or a means to an end. Ending a relationship solely because it no longer offers benefits is not advisable. It's important to recognize that true relationships are meant to last a lifetime. 3.) We cannot create zones for people to fit in because we are all unique so we must learn to embrace our differences rather than targeting each other for being different or acting differently. 4.) I cherish all the relationships that God has blessed me with. I make it a point to fulfill my responsibilities towards each one as best as I can. My family and friends, including my granny, parents, brother, husband and his family, my dear daughter, and wonderful friends, are the bedrock of my life. I cannot fathom navigating through life without their support. While I recognize that not everyone shares my perspective, I respect their viewpoints. I feel no compulsion to agree unless their ideas resonate with my heart and align with my principles. I define it as "INTEGRITY" - being true to my heart and living by my life's principles. Embracing tolerance and acceptance can transform our surroundings and foster the spread of happiness and smiles. This post aims to be beneficial for all as they interact with open-minded individuals. 'Praise' and 'Recognition' may be finite, but 'Inner Peace' is an enduring principle that no one can strip from you. Happy Thursday Everyone!

𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐏𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝟰 𝑨𝒈𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒔 Life can feel overwhelming at times, but peace doesn’t come from changing the world around us—it starts within. One of the most powerful tools I’ve discovered for inner peace is 𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝐹𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝐴𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠 by Don Miguel Ruiz. This simple yet profound guide helps us navigate life with more clarity and calm and that's why I'll be teaching it in class for the next month. If you’ve never heard of 𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝐹𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝐴𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠, or even if you have, here are four key ways they’ve helped me find more peace in my daily life: 𝐁𝐞 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐜𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 What we say to others—and ourselves—matters. Speaking with kindness and integrity creates less stress and fewer misunderstandings. This applies to how we talk to others, but also how we speak to ourselves. Positive self-talk has been a game-changer in boosting my peace of mind. 𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 Other people’s actions and words are often a reflection of them, not you. The moment I stopped personalizing every critique or comment, I found more freedom to just be myself. It’s a huge relief to let go of that pressure and just live authentically. 𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 How often do we assume things about situations or people without really knowing the facts? For me, this one has saved me from unnecessary stress and miscommunication. When I catch myself making assumptions, I pause and ask for clarity. It’s amazing how much drama that prevents! 𝐀𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 This agreement has taught me to focus on effort rather than perfection. By giving my best—whether it’s in work, relationships, or self-care—I’ve learned to be more compassionate with myself and feel at peace, knowing I’ve done what I can. It also helps me stay present, without stressing about outcomes. By practicing these four agreements, I’ve created more space for peace, compassion, and understanding in my life. It’s a journey, but these principles truly work when we put them into practice. What about you? Have you read 𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝐹𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝐴𝑔𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑚𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑠? Which one resonates most with you? Let’s chat in the comments—I’d love to hear your thoughts! #4agreements #peace #createalifeyoulove #bzenyoga

Today, once again, I found myself reflecting on and confronting the Value and Strength of Vulnerability… and I decided to share with you the fundamental steps to get in touch with our vulnerability… seeing it, embracing it, navigating it. Vulnerability is a fundamental tool for living better with ourselves and others, to achieve Authentic Serenity. Vulnerability in the context of inner growth can be an element of emotional and mental strength, showing oneself authentically for how one feels in the present moment. It is often experienced as a sign of weakness, perceived as an uncomfortable experience, where one feels naked, without protection. Being vulnerable essentially means having the courage to put oneself in a position where others could hurt us. It could also mean that we are exposing parts of ourselves that we are not very familiar with or comfortable sharing, allowing those in front of us to interact with us in that state of openness. There are elements related to our inner self that, if known, allow us to be vulnerable in a constructive and healthy way, such as: 1. Authenticity connected to our ability to show our human side 2. Connection with our physical and emotional sensations 3. Shame (an obstacle to vulnerability) 4. Sharing (an important exercise to strengthen the ability to open up) 5. Openness to receiving 6. The courage to take a risk When we are vulnerable within ourselves: • We develop the courage to be ourselves • We increase our level of self-esteem • We gain more self-confidence • We acquire greater emotional resilience When we are vulnerable with others: • We create more authentic relationships with the people around us • We create more empathy and emotional intimacy both in our personal and professional lives • We facilitate greater engagement from those present • We increase the level of understanding and participation of those who listen to us Possible insights into achieving greater Authenticity and Serenity with ourselves and others. Aspects that you might consider worthwhile to investigate… 1. Authenticity connected to our ability to show our human side. 2. Connection with our physical and emotional sensations 3. The sense of shame (an obstacle to vulnerability) 4. Honest Sharing (an exercise to strengthen the ability to open up) 5. To open up and learn to receive, let go of control 6. And finally, acquiring the courage to take a risk obtaining greater trust, clarity, and confidence in oneself. Thank you for taking the time to read this far. If you’re interested in exploring the topic further and would like to have a more direct exchange with me, you can write to me at [email protected]

Can I be really honest with you for a minute? I used to lie in bed at night, my stomach in knots, convinced there was something deeply wrong with me. All because I couldn't shake these intense desires for multiple loving connections in my life. Maybe you know exactly what I'm talking about? Look, we've all been fed this story about what "normal" relationships should look like. But here's the brutal truth – trying to force ourselves into that tiny box is slowly killing our souls. I've watched it create devastating anxiety, soul-crushing self-doubt, and relationships built on nothing but fear and lies. I lived that nightmare. And let me tell you – it nearly broke me. But then something incredible happened. The moment I finally stopped fighting who I really was... everything changed. Want to know the most beautiful secret I've discovered? When we finally embrace those "shadow" parts of ourselves – you know, the ones we've been taught to hide away in shame – we unlock this absolutely unstoppable confidence. It's like nothing I've ever experienced before. Here's what actually transformed everything for me: – I started radically accepting every single part of myself (even the scary bits) – I got brutally honest about ALL my feelings (no more hiding) – I built relationships on raw authenticity instead of fear – I threw out the rulebook and created my own definition of love The real magic? It happens the exact moment you stop apologizing for who you are and start celebrating it instead. I know this might feel terrifying. Trust me, I get it. But you deserve to feel completely, utterly at home in your own skin. If you're ready to break free from all that shame and step into your real power, I'd love to invite you to book a complimentary 45-minute breakthrough call with me. During our time together, we'll dive deep into your unique situation, uncover the root causes of your shame, and create a personalized action plan to help you embrace your authentic desires and build the fulfilling relationships you truly deserve. Don't wait another moment to start your journey to self-acceptance and emotional freedom. Book your breakthrough call now: https://lnkd.in/eMJkRsaK You've hidden long enough. It's time to set yourself free. With love and understanding, Kitty P.S. Remember – that voice telling you something's wrong with you? It's lying. You're not broken. You're just ready to evolve.

“Let me entertain you by talking to you about how great I think I am”… Does someone come to mind? Or several someones when you read that statement? I currently sit in a restaurant, listening to conversations all around me, where people are jockeying for position. They are giving themselves accolades, boasting about their accomplishments, etc. In essence, they are saying, “look at me and how great I am…and please respond by giving me more affirmation about my greatness”. Ugh. It makes me sad. Truly. This is a grab for connection and supprt by an insecure ego. Sadly, these tactics result in the opposite, which only fuels the cycle. A part of me wants to walk over to these people and put my hand on their shoulder, look in their eyes and say, “you are enough!”. I desire for that person to sit back, relax, and settle into their own skin and let the accolades from others flow in the most natural and organic of ways. When I hear people talking like this, I just wonder what type of wound has happened to them. Why do they need to constantly be reminded by others of how wonderful they are? Who spoke toxic words over them or what did they not receive when they were growing up? As always, I question what critical memories are in an unintegrated state, waiting to be neutralized so the triggering will stop. These insecure egos wake up every morning needing their approval and admiration reaffirmed by others. Only after they get their “hit” do they feel good. However, it is fleeting. All day, every day, in each conversation, each interaction, each statement they hear, they are looking for another “hit”. Exhausting…for all parties involved. When you don’t have a strong and secure sense of who you, then it is the words received from others that gives or takes away from your sense of worth. The flux is constant. The need is great. You want to be accepted. You want to feel seen. Regarding these individuals, I can guarantee that somewhere along the line, something or someone rocked their world and redefined their worth in a negative way. Somewhere they were not seen, not heard, not acknowledged. But why am I writing about this? I write to challenge our approach to these people. Rather than see them as annoying, let’s see them as people that need love. It’s hard to love these prickly pears sometimes, but truly, that is what they need. Maybe, they will be able to find somebody on their path (maybe someone like me) that says, “Come and join me. Let’s find the parts of you that are wounded and let’s heal”. And after the healing… How different would it be for them to join their friends for a meal and be perfectly comfortable. No more heart racing, no more insecurity nagging at them, just truly at peace. Gosh, maybe they even begin to be the one giving the compliments rather than doing the seeking. Just imagine!

A few days ago, I was having dinner with a friend, Rashesh Joshi. As we talked, the conversation naturally drifted to deeper topics—joy, peace, and what really brings us fulfillment. Rashesh shared a beautiful idea: instead of just talking about work or the usual challenges, why not ask each other how we’re truly doing? How we’re feeling emotionally, and mentally? It felt refreshing, like opening a door to conversations we don’t often have but might need. Later, I stumbled upon something that resonated with what Rashesh shared. I read that during Umar time as a king, people would meet and ask, ‘How is your relationship with the Creator today?’ This wasn’t just a casual question but a way of checking in on one’s inner peace and purpose. They prioritized well-being in a holistic way, encouraging each other to stay grounded and focused on what truly matters. Research even backs this up. Studies show that when people connect over meaningful topics like well-being and inner peace, it boosts happiness, lowers stress, and strengthens relationships. Imagine if, as a group, we made space to ask each other these kinds of questions—not just about daily stresses but about what brings us joy and peace or helps us feel centered. Maybe we could try this in our own circle. It could be as simple as asking, ‘What’s been bringing you joy lately?’ or ‘How are you finding peace these days?’ Just like how I felt when Rashesh asked also those communities, it might help us connect on a level that brings fulfillment and support to everyone.

This week I have found myself 'triggered' by several events that left me feeling either 'dismissed' or 'extracted upon'. There's been times where my heart has told me 'something is a no and it's not for me.' These are feelings I am very familiar with. I won't go in the detail as this post is not about the what but about the reflections that have emerged for me as a result of this relational thinking, doing and being. In the past, I probably would have judged or blamed 'the other(s).' I would also have positioned myseld as 'a victim'. I would have been worried about not 'pleasing' others.I Not this time. I know too well that the universe always provides. All my encounters are a gift to unlearn and learn through interconnections, to re-member who I truly am (both in terms of mind and body). And once again, I wasn't disappointed. There's something around: 💞 owning my 'sh@t and stuff' - nobody can make me feel anything. Why did I feel dismissed or extracted upon? 💝 it was about values and what matters deeply to me, about what beliefs I hold about several topics 💭 I chose to share openly and authentically with the other person and it felt so good to be open and honest We have all been conditioned and socialised and it runs deep - oh so deep.  These were opportunities to look at some of it, to challenge and change and to decide how I want to show up in the world. In every moment I get to choose. I can feel the emotion and discomfort and push it away and I can also choose to pause, to look at it, embrace the emotions (all of them - whether positive or negative) and to choose pure love or fear. In those instances I chose pure love ❤️  and as the picture shows, the outcome was, I feel, a very positive one because it's an inside out process. What we put in is what we get out. It is such a simple process. It required me to be true to my values and to make the commitment to embody them fully and to live and breathe them in every minute of every moment Have you had similar experiences lately? What has been your approach? Steve Schecter Cara Templeton Christine Freeland Jessica Harper Leonie-Ruth Acland Treesje Verlinden Cara Templeton Jessica Riddell Image source Rosy / Bad Homburg / Germany

Hear this out 🌎 Accepting ourselves has to be one of our greatest hurdles in Life. And how do we ever know how much we have? Considered it. Our emotions are often a good barometer of where we're at, but so are our words and our reactions. Have you ever noticed yourself saying: - "It's ok. Doesn't matter." - "It was silly of me to react like that. It wasn't all that bad." - "Oh, you don't need to thank me." - "All good. A blind man would be glad to see it." - "Thanks, but I could have done better." How quick we are to minimise our pain; deflect a compliment, praise, or congratulations; dive for cover when being acknowledged publicly; or pretend that everything is ok, when it's not ok. Why do we do this? It all comes down to low self-acceptance. Peer pressure, social norms and family culture are there to make sure we "don't get too big for our boots"! What an absurdity that a world that seems to praise individuality, at the same time frequently crushes it. So what are we to do? Learn love, grace and humility. In doing so, we become capable of: *Accepting and absorbing kind words and actions. *Willingly give others kind words and actions. *Managing our emotions. *Accepting when our emotions are validated. *Understanding that we are worthy of the acknowledgment of our pain and suffering, that it was a big deal for us. *Accepting love more deeply and intensely. *Feeling and knowing that we are appreciated for who we are and how we contribute. *Being authentic and real The world is all too ready to pull people down, so why add our own voice to it? Pls, hear me clearly when I say... You are a very valuable, unique and special person. I thank you for what you've done. I'm sorry that you've been hurt. You're doing a great job! That must have been tough. I'm sorry that they didn't understand you. I see you. I hear you.🧭 Know thyself. Know your life.🧭 It's Garrison Pearse here, sharing insights about identity, self-awareness, productive mindsets, being intentional, inner healing, psychological and emotional intelligence. Also, an EDISC personality and behavioural profiler. Follow me for insights, encouragement and empowerment toward living a quality life. 🧭 rk #onelife #love #life #motivation #travel #onelove #lifestyle #photography #onelifebaby #mylife #fitness #india #loveyourself #like #nature #follow #happy #style #instadaily #photooftheday #happiness #fitnessmotivation #inspiration #selflove #smile #model #samojako #loveyourself #success #likeforlikes #believe #music #travel #positivevibes #selflove #girl #fun #goals #yourself #instalike #fitness #model #motivationalquotes #l #mindset #likes #followforfollowback #insta #quoteoftheday #friends #inspirationalquotes #family #live #quote #positivity #poetry #peace

When we see someone struggling or acting unusually, or getting more upset than we think they should, we often think they have a problem - when what they really have is a superpower. Author Ken Page does amazing work with superpowers. He calls them Core Gifts, and says that until you know and cherish your own core gifts, you will fail at really loving yourself. Superpowers are where we’re especially gifted in life. Sensitivity can be a superpower. So can authenticity, or fierceness, or loyalty, or competitiveness. Think about your possible superpowers: what are the qualities that make you especially you? These are probably your superpowers. In my Social Skills for Life class (https://lnkd.in/gAJJ-DJw), we do a deep dive to find out what our superpowers are - and this is a huge part of the self-love and confidence our students take from the class. As cool as having superpowers sounds, they’re also hard to handle. They’re where we’re A LOT in life - more than others are used to being. Where we have superpowers, we’re more sensitive to life - which makes us more vulnerable to get hurt along these lines. Someone gifted in honesty might say too much to someone who uses it to get them in trouble. Or someone gifted in empathy might be taken advantage of by crueler-minded, thicker skinned peers who make sport of hurting them. So often life (friends, family, society, teachers) tells us to be LESS of our superpowers. They don’t know how to handle us, and our gifts seem to be creating problems for us and those around us! But the answer isn’t to be less of what makes us unique - it’s to learn how to be ourselves skillfully. Part of that is recognizing the people and situations that punish us for being ourselves - or simply fail to honor who we are. And it’s also about putting ourselves INTO relationships and situations that LOVE us for being as much of ourselves as we are. This is true for friendships, romantic partners, and the work we pursue: go where people LOVE you for being as uniquely you as you really are. To get there, we first have to RECOGNIZE our superpowers. But simply knowing our superpowers isn’t enough. We have to TREASURE them - because only once we treasure these core parts of ourselves will we avoid putting them into the hands of others who are likely to hurt or break them. So notice where you’re different. Notice where you’re “a lot.” And see if there isn’t a superpower behind that. A part of you needing to be cherished, protected, and more skillfully shared with the world. Knowing our superpowers is a HUGE part of our Social Skills for Life class. It helps us learn where to navigate in life. Because you can’t plant a seed in the wrong climate and expect it to bear fruit. #kenpage #coregifts #deeperdating #socialskillsforlife #teenconfidence #confidence #selflove #growthwise #jamestreadway #sensitvity #superpowers