Kelly Bayett’s Post

Do you always feel like switching to another company/role? Here is the story of one of my clients who had a vicious cycle of regret that was going on for the past decade! She would switch to a new company, feel dissatisfied, leave the company and then would feel dissatisfied with something else and felt the urge to leave again All this while- she would keep on judging herself for leaving the company ➡️Her problem was 3 fold 1) She was consistently dissatisfied with something, never content and therefore kept switching 2) She constantly judged herself and feared others’ judgement too 3) She always felt like she was in the wrong job and had no clarity on why she felt that When she came to me for being coached- she thought that its going to take years for her to come out of her problems but we achieved massive progress in weeks Here is how: ➡️Step 1: Her foremost problem was that she never really defined her “Why”. She didn’t know why she was doing her job. Because of this she would measure her success with what others think success is. So I coached her extensively on this and made her take 1 week to only think about her “Why” . That alone gave her a shocking realization that she was living her life on autopilot. She contemplated a lot and found- most of her ideas of success were “borrowed”, they were never hers. ➡️Step 2: Addressing Childhood Traumas. Another problem with my client was that she had childhood trauma of being always compared to, always being told to live up to society’s expectation and be a poster “good girl”. Because of this- she would judge herself even for the right decisions she was taking. Here I did Inner Childhood Healing with her, helped her see her Inner Dialogue and gave her practices to follow everyday to keep her anxiety calm. ➡️Step 3: Career Roadmap. Since she never really knew her “Why”. She never made a career roadmap for her. Here I coached her in gaining clarity on her next steps to her careers, cleared all her doubts and fears and we came up with a step by step plan for her to follow As a coach- I love clients who commit. And despite her situation being very tricky- she committed and had faith and that is what made the difference. —————————————————- I help ambitious professionals like you overcome your self doubt + anxiety and master your Self Confidence. If you need help, Book a clarity session with me Link in comments + my profile

We've all been there. In business, on the football field, or somewhere in your day-to-day. You're pushing yourself, working hard, and suddenly, you hit a wall. Obstacles arise. Adversity hits. The doubts creep in, the fatigue sets in, and you start wondering if it's all worth it. It's at this very moment that the urge to quit feels the strongest. Truth is, something I've learned through my journey in football and life: Right when you feel like quitting, that's when you have to keep going. In those moments of intense struggle and uncertainty, you are standing at the threshold of growth and achievement. It's like running a marathon and hitting "the wall" at mile 20 – your body and mind are screaming for you to stop, but if you push through, you’ll experience a breakthrough. Here's what I've discovered about persevering through those tough moments: 1. Breakthroughs Happen Beyond the Breaking Point. Often, the most significant progress comes right after we think we can't go any further. Whether it's in training, in business, or personal growth, pushing through that barrier is where real transformation happens, both mentally and physically. 2. Resilience Builds Character. Every time you choose to keep going despite the urge to quit, you're building resilience. This resilience not only helps you in the current challenge but also prepares you for future ones. It becomes a part of who you are – a person who doesn't give up easily. Grit is a key to success! 3. Small Wins Lead to Big Victories. When you're tempted to quit, focus on small milestones instead of the entire journey ahead. Celebrate those small victories, and use them as fuel to keep moving forward. Each small step adds up to significant progress over time. 4. Believe in Your Why. Reconnect with your purpose. Why did you start this journey in the first place? What are you striving to achieve? Reminding yourself of your "why" can reignite your passion and give you the strength to keep pushing forward. 5. Support Systems Matter. Lean on your support network. Whether it’s family, friends, mentors, or teammates, the people around you can provide the encouragement and perspective you need to persevere. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or share your struggles. I've faced many moments in my career where quitting seemed like the easier option. From grueling training sessions to overcoming injuries, the journey hasn't always been smooth. But each time I felt like giving up, I remembered that the struggle is temporary, but the pride of overcoming it lasts forever. So, if you're in that tough spot right now, feeling like you want to throw in the towel, remember this: You are stronger than you think. Your breakthrough is just around the corner. Keep going, keep pushing, and don’t let the momentary pain deter you from your long-term goals. Here's to persevering and achieving greatness, one step at a time. Have a great week everyone! - Alec #Perseverance #Resilience #WorkEthic #ForgedIngold

The Illusion of Having It Together Raise your hand if, as a kid, you believed that people in their 20s had it all figured out. Yeah Likewise, here. • I haven’t figured out my career. • I don’t have a successful business. • I'm not the smartest among my peers. • I don't have a fancy car or a nice house/apartment. I thought by 25, I’d have my finances, business, and relationships sorted out. Instead, I found myself juggling part-time jobs just to pay rent. As an international graduate, I faced many challenges, such as struggling with my permanent residency (or I'm out of the country) and finding a well-paying job. Even getting disappointments from people I deemed close. Right after graduation, during COVID, I remember thinking,. If I don’t get a job within two weeks, I won’t be able to pay my rent. Until last year, I worked a part-time job on top of my full-time job just to make ends meet. There were nights I barely slept, juggling work and personal commitments. I’m sharing this because I know someone reading this might be doubting themselves or struggling. You are not alone. I understand your pain. I’m grateful for this journey. Mistakes and failures became my teachers. Success remains an acquaintance I’m trying to get close to. Despite all the challenges, I make sure I keep investing in my three main assets: 1. Physical: By engaging in regular physical activity, even if something as simple as walking. 2. Mental: Reading, listening to podcasts, watching educational YouTube videos, and talking to people smarter than me. 3. Spiritual: Praying and reading about my religion. If you’re not into religion, meditate and read philosophy. “Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity” Seneca I believe we, as humans, are like armies. We should always be training for any unexpected chaos, so when it happens, we can control the situation. But Sohaib, that’s a lot to take in at once. I hear you. If you think this is too much, start with the basics: - Show up to work, treat your coworkers with respect and dignity. - Cut ties with anyone who thinks tea is better than coffee.  - Speak the truth and be kind to those around you. - Call your friends and family. - Write on LinkedIn. - Help someone. - Go for a walk. - Grab a book. Do anything. Static is death, life is in momentum and movement A reminder to everyone to keep investing in themselves, do the right thing ,and to give more than you take. Eventually, everything will add up. Most people don’t have it figured out. If everyone does, life will be pointless. Your LinkedIn bro, SZ

When Things Go South I'm in the middle of some challenges and facing some failures. Hence, I'm sharing this, with my dear friend Nurul Hilaliah Yussof in mind, who is battling her own challenges too. Not to forget, to any of you, who need this, to find ourselves in corporate rat race. Life isn’t always a smooth upward trajectory. Sometimes, despite our best efforts, things take an unexpected turn. Whether it’s losing a job, facing a failed interview, missing out on a big tender, or saying goodbye to a valued team member, setbacks can feel like a punch to the gut. But remember, it’s not about the fall; it’s about how you rise. Stop Catastrophic Thinking: Our minds can be our greatest allies or our worst enemies. When faced with adversity, it’s easy to spiral into catastrophic thinking; 'I’ll never find another job,' 'I’m a failure,' or 'This is the end.' Recognize these negative thought loops and replace them with more realistic ones. Instead of dwelling on worst-case scenarios, tell yourself, 'I believe in myself, and I’ll find a way.' Embrace Your Identity Beyond Work: Losing a job or a tender doesn’t diminish your worth. You are more than your professional title. Take this opportunity to explore other facets of your identity, your passions, hobbies, and personal growth. Remember, you’re not defined solely by your career. Learn from Other Failures: Colonel Sanders (KFC) or even Khairul Aming, all of them faced rejection and setbacks. Yet, they persevered, redefined themselves, and achieved greatness. Their stories remind us that setbacks are steppingstones to success. Learn from their resilience. Seek Support: Reach out to friends, family, or mentors. Share your feelings and fears. Sometimes, a listening ear or a heartfelt conversation can provide clarity and comfort. You’re not alone in this journey. Reflect and Realign: Use this time to reflect on your goals, values, and aspirations. Did that failed interview reveal areas for improvement? Did losing a team member highlight gaps in communication? Adjust your course accordingly. Every setback is an opportunity for growth. Self-Care Matters: Job loss or any setback can be emotionally draining. Prioritize self-care, such as having a nice meal (and hoping not to gain weight!) exercise, read, or spend time in nature. Recharge your mental and emotional batteries. Remember, you’re not just rebuilding a career, you’re nurturing your well-being. Keep Moving Forward: Resilience isn’t about avoiding setbacks, it’s about bouncing back stronger. Update your resume, network, and apply for new opportunities. Celebrate small victories, the first interview, positive feedback, or a promising lead. Progress, no matter how small, fuels resilience. When things go south, remember that you’re not alone. You’re part of a resilient community that has faced adversity and emerged stronger. Embrace the journey, learn from setbacks, and keep moving forward. Your next chapter awaits!

“Tears of a Clown” – Smokey Robinson’s hit song perfectly encapsulates the struggle of many mid-career IT professionals who feel stuck. Take my client, for example. To the outside world, he is the epitome of success. Colleagues and friends often tell him how they wish they could be in his shoes. He has played into this perception, always wearing a smile and being the life of the party. But inside, he feels empty. It’s been years since he felt truly challenged or interested in his job. His “golden handcuffs” are forged from others’ perceptions: the income, the family, the home, and the reputation that define traditional success. He feels isolated. How can he express his discontent when everyone insists he’s so lucky, and should be grateful? The burden of his family responsibilities only compounds his sense of entrapment. Where can he find a safe space to share these feelings? How can he escape this virtual prison? Dan is a product of our society. The AP classes, long hours, corporate grind, and competitive environment all developed his skills for achievement. We are told the prize is at the top, and we must accept the compromises along the way. This approach works for some, but it’s a mistake to believe it’s the only way. Dan is one of those who succeeded in attaining the trappings of success but is slowly dying inside as he continues to live by others’ expectations. The way out is for Dan to take all he has learned about achieving in his current career and add new skills that will transform his work into something that nourishes him. Are you like Dan? Are you putting on a public face while internally struggling? Suggestions: 1. Journaling: For the next five days, journal as soon as you wake up, before starting work. Fill three pages with your thoughts, letting the words flow without concern for grammar, logic, or structure. Partial thoughts, repeated words, and misspellings are all okay. Write what comes to mind and what you hesitate to say to anyone else. 2. Find a Trusted Confidant: Seek someone outside your immediate family or workplace whom you can trust with your confidential thoughts. Their role is to listen, not to fix you. 3. Seek Professional Help: Consider engaging a coach or other professional to share your thoughts and uncover options. This support can help you find work that aligns with what’s most important to you without sacrificing your well-being. “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” – Albert Schweitzer

Willpower and self-discipline is overrated.  There is a simpler way to work on yourself, your career and your life! Workaholism, working extremely hard, being extremely busy, having no time for anything except work has for some reason been looked upon as being core to being successful. It's appreciated, adored and told with a lot of pride, and no wonder the whole world is pursuing this way of living life. In the absence of not being that, we usually blame ourselves and say - oh, I don’t have enough will power or self-discipline to work towards my goals. What a sad way of looking at life. What if there was a better way to work towards your goals, an easy and human friendly way that supports our growth and change 🙂 Here are simple steps to set and work towards those goals: ~ setting goals that uplifts and inspires you and not because you “should” do it ~ building the right systems and processes that don’t allow you to give up, and ~ support networks or groups. Everytime you get stuck or are not moving at the pace at which you would like to, ask these questions: 𝟭. 𝗜𝘀 𝗺𝘆 𝗴𝗼𝗮𝗹 𝗮 “𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗴𝗼𝗮𝗹” 𝗼𝗿 𝗮 “𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗴𝗼𝗮𝗹” If you continue to set goals based on others' version and vision, you will need willpower, self-discipline, and a fear-based approach to move forward.  However, if your goals are based on how you would like your life to be, then you work with happiness, love, self compassion and gratitude. 𝟮. 𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗜 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝘁 𝗮 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁 𝘀𝘆𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗺 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝗺𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝘆 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸? For example, if you want to reduce weight, you need to walk for 30 minutes daily. And until it becomes a habit you will forget it, so set alarms, ask people to remind you, find an accountability partner, put post-its, find a trainer to help you.  This is how you leverage the resources to help you reach your goals. 𝟯. 𝗔𝗺 𝗜 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲? Who’s your company? If you are surrounded by people who are doing the opposite of what you want to do, there are more chances of you giving up than working towards your goals.  So build your company intentionally so that it accelerates and not decelerates your progress. Working towards goals is easier than we think. Most of us struggle to make it work. Facing challenges when we work outside our comfort zone is normal. Apply the above 3-step process and see if it makes it easier to move forward. Let me know if you have depended too much on willpower to help you move forward? And which amongst the above 3 usually is most often the reason that you give up? If you have any ways that help you sail through the tough times, do share in the comments too.  Do-Follow Deepa Chandrasekaran, Career Acceleration Expert I help corporate leaders navigate their career challenges to build purposeful and thriving careers! DM me for 1:1 coaching, consultations, and corporate workshops.

Self-Improvement and Resistance When you decide to work on yourself, being more disciplined, and putting in hard work, you might notice that not everyone around you is cheering you on. Some people might make fun of you, call you crazy, or seem envious of what you're doing. If you've ever wondered why this happens, you're not alone. Why do they do this? 1. People Don’t Like Change When you start making positive changes, it can make others feel uncomfortable. They might not even realize it, but seeing you grow can make them feel uneasy about where they are in life. People usually like things to stay the same, and when you start changing, it can shake up how they feel about themselves and their relationship with you. 2. Your Success Might Highlight Their Insecurities When you’re improving, it can remind others of what they’re not doing or where they feel like they’re falling short. This can lead to feelings of jealousy or discomfort. They might be worried that they’re getting left behind or that your relationship will change, so they react by criticizing or making fun of you. 3. They Might Misread Your Actions Sometimes, people might think you’re trying to show off or act better than them, even if that’s not your intention at all. This misunderstanding can lead them to call you crazy or make jokes at your expense. It’s not that they truly think you’re out of your mind; they just don’t fully get why you’re doing what you’re doing. 4. They’re Dealing with Their Own Issues Sometimes, people project their own fears and insecurities onto others. When they see you working hard and making progress, it might make them more aware of their own fears of failure or feeling inadequate. Instead of dealing with those feelings, it’s easier for them to put you down. How to Handle It? - Stick to Your Goals: Remember why you started this journey. Your goals are important, and other people’s opinions shouldn’t stop you from achieving them. - Find Supportive People: Surround yourself with friends, mentors, or communities that understand and support what you’re trying to do. Having a good support system makes it easier to stay on track. - Don’t Take It Personally: Understand that when people react negatively, it’s often more about them than you. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is ignore the negativity or respond with understanding. - Explain Your Intentions: If you feel like it might help, try explaining why you’re making these changes to the people close to you. This might help clear up any misunderstandings. As you work on bettering yourself, it’s important to tell the difference between helpful feedback and negativity that’s rooted in jealousy or misunderstanding. Keep your focus on what matters most to you, and let your progress do the talking. Have you ever experienced something like this, or have you ever done this to others? Share your experiences. #selfimprovement #groups #peerpressure #grow #personaldevelopment

7 Things You Should Start Doing Today to Be Successful Tomorrow: 1. Start Taking Ownership: Most people have excuses, or need to blame others when things aren’t working out. But, true success happens when we take responsibly and don’t make excuses, when we’re accountable for our actions and don’t blame others, and when we say, “If it’s going to happen, it will happen because I made it happen.” Excuses will always be there for you, but opportunities won’t. 2. Start Being More Focused: If you want to succeed, you have to stop being distracted by everything around you and be more focused on what you want to achieve. Your distractions are wasting your time, and keeping you from being focused. Embrace tunnel vision to do what you have to do and get it done. When you focus on what you want, everything else falls away. Stay focused on whatever you want to do, and don’t doubt yourself. Focus means we have to follow one course until we’re successful. Stop getting distracted by the things that have nothing to do with your goals. 3. Start Fighting for What You Want: Some will succeed because they’re destined to, but most succeed because they fight for what they want. To achieve something significant, you have to be fearless in pursuit of what you want to achieve. And even if nobody believes in what you’re doing, you have to do what it takes to make it happen—you have to be determined, and you have to have tenacity. The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in the person who’s determined. Don’t be afraid to give yourself everything you ever wanted in life. 4. Start Engaging With People You Admire: Having people you admire and look up to in your life can be a great resource for learning and motivation. Start hanging out with people who’re dependable and reliable. Always choose relationships based on respect and trust, and make sure that their words match their actions and deeds. 5. Start Being More Disciplined: Discipline gives us the freedom to put all our focus into achieving our goals. But, it becomes increasingly harder to be disciplined in a world that’s in constant distraction and relies on instant gratification, and thus sometimes our long-term goals get put off. Discipline is simply choosing between what you want now and what you want most. And the truth is, anyone who ever did anything important was disciplined. 6. Start Making Happiness a Priority: What’s important to you must be made a priority. Don’t waste another second on the things that drain your energy or make you feel fatigued—start noticing what makes you feel happiest and work hard on achieving it. 7. Start Being Grateful: Feeling grateful is one of the most medicinal emotions we can feel. It elevates your mood, and it fills you with happiness. 📌Don't count the days,make the days count⚡

Not Giving Up Many great people have the same mindset which has contributed a lot to their success: not giving up. As a child I often heard the story that Edison has tried over two thousand times before he finally invented the electric light bulb that changed the world revolutionarily. It was just a story for a 10 year old girl. Today, I would say it is not just a distant story. It is exactly what we face every day in life: failure, setback, stand up, try again, setback again, stand up again…. It can be your application to a university or your dream job, it can be your attempt to receive a scholarship, it can be your study to get the best test performance, it can be your effort to become the tiktok or instagram influencer, it can be your inquiry to connect someone and so on. Dreams usually come true after a lot of trying and learning from failures. I remember how many rejections I got to get the first job offer after the study or to get a rented room in a shared apartment where I studied in west Germany. How many times I was disappointed by those rejections and how many times I shed my tears and got up again. If I had given up, I would not be living in Germany to eat original  bratwurst or Maultaschen,(while the real thing is to have a happy family and nice German colleagues around 😄.) If I had given up, I would not have the chance to see the world and live in a completely different culture which greatly expands my perspective. If I had given up, I would be a humble person to think only a short way for my future. Giving up is easy. Just step back into the comfort zone and look at others struggling in hardship. Not giving up is difficult because you are the one who is struggling and fighting. However, those difficulties and hardships make you strong and unbeatable. I found it quite interesting that the rejections made me even more motivated to do something to change it. From the rejections I tried to reflect what I could do better next time or in what area I should improve myself. The self optimization prepared me to receive less rejection in this area in the future.  As a concrete example, I wanted to strengthen my network in my professional life. It is easy to hang out with peers or colleagues below my level. But high level managers usually have neither the time nor the intention to connect with me. So what do I do? Not giving up and more importantly bringing them my values. I received a rejection from a new VP for a get-to-know meeting. I told myself not to give up and to find someone with a similar level to the new VP who can introduce me to her. Do you want to give up when facing setbacks? ask from your heart and respond from your mind. 

Some of the worst decisions in my life I took them when I felt trapped, with no resources available, rushed and stressed. I was missing time, money, mental and physical energy, knowledge, experience, connections, confidence in my skills, patience and maturity. Have I suffered from making bad decisions? Yes! Have I bounced back from them? Yes, somewhat! Will I make the same decisions again? I hope not. Will I make other mistakes in the future? I am sure I will. Will I make the same mistakes again? I am planning not to. We are afraid to talk about mistakes or about difficult situations we might be in. We think we will be judged or that we will be perceived as weak, not able to deal with what professional or private life has to throw at us. We rather be stuck or deal with the consequences of our bad decisions, keep them a secret and not share them with others to avoid those feelings that come with sharing bad times with others who might not support us or worse, take advantage of us when we are in need of help/advice/coaching. So we keep it to ourselves and hope for the best. Will that work? Yes, somewhat. Can we make something about it? I believe so. For me, what worked during tough times was to take a brake and gain clarity over what I can do using my skills, resources, knowledge to better myself and my situation. It helped listing out points to follow and barriers to maintain. It helped connecting back to my vision and reminding myself of my values. Easy to do? No! When you have a hard time you are burning through a lot of energy and resources and the last thing you want to do is use you brain some more, but in my case it helped a lot. Having someone you can talk to can make a huge difference during though times so for those of you who feel stuck, especially at work, I will leave a link in the comments to book a free meeting with me where we can explore your situation and how I can be of service to you knowing how hard can be to go through this alone. Book a free session and let's talk! See the link below.