I'm not too active with posts but I really enjoyed this one where I share my thoughts and experiences about William Ury's view of the art of negotiations and the path of the possible, 'going to the balcony, building the golden bridge and taking the third side'.
Commercial Manager | Experienced Deal Lead @ Shell - Renewable Energy, Oil & Gas | Search Inside Yourself Certified Teacher™
It was easy to choose what to listen to during my workout this morning. William Ury is cofounder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation and coauthor of the classic bestseller ‘Getting to Yes’. And interestingly also an anthropologist. So many amazing stories he shares. Experiences with Hugo Chavez, Kim Jong Un and Denis Rodman, Nelson Mandela, Abilio Diniz… Very interesting the way he summarizes the art of negotiation in one sentence. ‘The path of the possible is to go to the balcony, build the golden bridge and take the third side’. 1. Go to the balcony. It starts with us. Influence ourselves first. Inside job. Self-awareness. Self-mastery. 2. Build a golden bridge. Making it as easy as possible for the other side to do what you want them to do. By listening. By being creative. By writing their victory speech. By attracting. Find a way forward, influence the other. 3. Take the third side. Influence the whole. Consider the side of the community around. Find creative options. No matter how complex and high stakes involved, at the end it is all about people. How to engage, build trust, truly listen and uncover underlying interests, not just positions. And how can we start with ourselves, ’going to the balcony’, creating distance to the issues, widening perspective, being deeply self-aware. From there be creative, co-create possibilities for a third way. Find common ground. Our ego driven and competitive corporate culture many times better recognizes who can play hardball, be the tough negotiator. Yes, such skill is certainly important. But other skills are also greatly important, if not more, for finding agreement. Those require exploring more ego-less approach, true empathy, curiosity and creativity to jointly identify possibilities that can serve both sides’ interests. This is what I also learned over my career. At the end, a good deal should be good for all parties involved, otherwise it may not be sustainable. Any thoughts? Tim Ferriss William Ury