As pre-teens become more independent with their move to secondary school, they become more confident internet users with more varied habits. The internet offers them many benefits, so it’s vital to discuss online safety regularly.
Here's what you can do to help: Set up parental controls on your home broadband, as well as all internet-enabled devices that your child has access to. Many will have inbuilt controls to help you manage which apps and sites your child can access and for how long, helping you ensure their time online is positive and has a purpose. Our setup safe parental control guides will walk you through the steps so you can get set up in just a few minutes.
Get them involved when setting controls so they feel part of the process. Make sure to review them as they grow and become more active online. As the internet rapidly becomes a more regular part of your child's daily life, make sure you enable safe search settings on popular sites that they're using, like Google and YouTube. Set boundaries or have a family contract to set their expectations for the sites and apps they can use, remembering that you are a role model and they will copy what they see you do. Encourage them to leave devices outside the bedroom at night and have regular screen-free family times.
There may be an increasing number of ways your child will be online: gaming consoles, personal assistants, laptops for school, as well as smartphones. So, stay interested in what they are doing, respecting their growing independence. Encourage them to use their devices in shared areas and set up a user account just for your child. Most children get their first smartphone before they are 12. But if you feel they aren't old enough, explain why and help them deal with any pressure from their peers to get a device to fit in.
Keep them safe on the move by making use of inbuilt safety settings on mobile networks and devices to filter out inappropriate content. Check age ratings on games, apps, films, and social networks to see if they are age-appropriate. For game ratings, check out the Pan-European Game Information classifications, or PEGI ratings, and look for age ratings in app stores. Have conversations with your child about how they use the internet and what they may find there.
Most social media platforms have a minimum age of 13 or above, but many children use them, so consider whether your child is mature enough to post responsibly and manage any risks they may encounter. Encourage them to develop their critical thinking, making it a habit to question what they see online and not to take everything at face value. Teach your child ways that they can protect themselves online, like enabling strict privacy settings, using block and ignore functions, and the importance of keeping personal information private.
Remind them that not everyone they meet online may be genuine and they should never meet anyone they have only met online in real life without you or an adult they already know and trust. Help your teen feel confident about saying no if they're asked to do anything that makes them feel worried or uncomfortable and to tell you about it. Connected technology is hugely positive for most children. You can help them develop a healthy relationship with screens and tech, teaching them how to have a good balance of online and offline activity and a balanced digital diet.
Because safety on the internet matters.
Research shows that pre-teens like to watch videos, play video games and use messaging apps.
The following platforms are most popular among children aged 11-13. Make sure to set the apps your child uses for safety with the guides below.
Research shows that pre-teens experience the following issues more than any others. Explore the resources below to help tackle potential harm.
Use these practical tips to help pre-teens have safer online experiences and develop their digital resilience.
Encourage your child to talk to you about how they use the internet and show you what they do. Discuss with them the kinds of things they might come across. A good time to talk is when they get a new device or mention a new website.
SEE CONVERSATION GUIDEIf your child has a social media profile, teach them to block or ignore people and how to set strict privacy settings. Request that you or someone you both trust becomes their ‘friend’ or ‘follower’ to check that conversations and posts are appropriate.
The age ratings that come with games, apps, films and social networks are a good guide to whether they’re suitable for your child. For example, the age limit is 13 for several social media sites including TikTok and Instagram.
SEE AGE MINIMUMSEncourage them to use their tech devices in a communal area such as the living room or kitchen and set up a user account for your child. If you think they aren’t old enough to have a mobile phone or tablet, stay firm and explain the reasons why.
Agree and set boundaries with them or have a family agreement for their internet use, including when and where they can use portable devices and for how long, before they get used to doing their own thing.
SEE TEMPLATEBe aware that if your child is accessing the internet using public WiFi they may not have safety features active. Some providers are part of family friendly WiFi schemes with filters to block inappropriate content. Look out for friendly WiFi symbols like RDI Friendly WiFi symbols when you’re out and about.
LEARN ABOUT FRIENDLY WIFIActivate parental controls on your home broadband along with all devices including mobile phones and games consoles. Safe search settings can also be activated on search engines and platforms or apps like YouTube, Roblox and TikTok.
FIND PARENTAL CONTROLSTalk to children about the benefits and risks of social media before they join any sites or download any apps. Let them know that anything they upload, email or message could stay around forever online.
GO TO ADVICE HUBLearn about your pre-teen's favourite video games, platforms and online interests by joining them. Remember, their online life is their real life -- so take an interest. Give them the opportunity to show you some of their favourite things.
Download or print this guide to help keep your pre-teen safe online.
Explore a range of age guides across online issues to help support your pre-teen.
If your child needs additional support, share the following resources with them. From helplines to forums with others their age, there are many ways for them to get support.
