Some Conservatives Don't Believe Men Silence Women's Votes At The Polls — These 18 Stories Are Proving Otherwise

Note: Discussions of suicide.

Because many find it hard to believe that men could be suppressing women’s votes, I asked the BuzzFeed Community to share experiences of witnessing — or personally facing — attempts by men to control or silence their votes.

Here's everything they shared:

1. "Back when it was Trump vs. Clinton, my not-so-savory older brother tried to control my and my older sister's votes by demanding we vote for Trump. His threat? 'You vote for Killary, I will disown you both.' My sister and I took one look at each other and knew he wasn't going to force us to do what he wanted. She and I happily went to vote alone and cast our votes for whomever we wanted."

—Anonymous

2. "I once requested a mail-in ballot because I was going to be out of town on voting day. When the ballot arrived, my husband filled it out. I asked why he would do that, and he responded that we vote the same anyway."

—Anonymous

3. "I knew a man who refused to drive his elderly mother to vote all because she wanted to vote for Hillary and not Trump in 2016. The same man's wife said that she didn't want to vote for Trump after the Access Hollywood tape came out, but that she would because her husband insisted."

—Anonymous

4. "In 2016, my significant other broke up with me because I would not let him tell me how to vote. No woman needs a man to tell her how to vote!"

—officialmeat742

5. "My father. He said, and I quote, 'The downfall of this country was when they gave women the right to vote because women are too stupid to know how to vote. If left on their own, they will vote Democrat. That's why women have to be told by their husbands how to vote correctly, which is Republican. I vote straight Republican on my ticket.' If my parents went to vote, my father would interrogate my mother when they got back in the vehicle."

"If she voted for someone other than how he voted, he'd throw a hissy fit and say, 'Well, you just went and canceled out my vote. Yep, that's exactly what you did. Now *my* vote don't count!' She stopped going to vote for a long time to 'keep down an argument and to make sure his little vote will count.'"

—Anonymous

6. "My husband doesn't believe that anyone should vote. He thinks it's all controlled by the Vatican or Freemasons. He doesn't want me to vote. I already filled in an absentee mail-in ballot and put it in a special locked box. He would be very angry if he knew."

—Anonymous

7. "My youngest sister is 25 and, until recently, has lived with my father. She has never voted because he constantly threatened to kick her out if she did. He's Republican and knew she wasn't. This election is the first she will ever vote in."

—Anonymous

8. "I'll never forget my dad proudly announcing he voted Brexit and 'your mother did, too.' The look on her face said she had no control over it despite the harsh effect on my job and plans."

—floatingjester35

9. "My grandmother's grandmother was a suffragette. Her family put her into an asylum for that, where she committed suicide."

"My grandmother joined the League of Women Voters because of her. She had all boys, and they're also feminists (one of them my dad)."

—Chakram_sola

10. "Four years ago, I decided to get involved with election administration. I run a polling place in Texas, and I'd say one of the most common things I have to tell couples is that they can't converse, pass notes, or literally stand behind one another while voting. They also shouldn't look at each other's ballots before putting them into the scanner. This is the law, but men have become belligerent when I ask them politely."

"In a few cases, I've had to remove a man from the voting area while their spouse finishes their ballot. One woman told me it was fine for her husband to interfere because she was his wife. Most women look slightly alarmed when I step in, but there's also a lot of silent gratitude. I will always protect a woman's right to the privacy of her ballot."

—Anonymous

11. "During the 2008 election, my then-husband printed out a list of all the Republican candidates to vote for down the ballot and handed it to me as I walked to my booth. I do not commit to a party. I vote for who I want."

—Anonymous

12. "Every time my mother voted, my father told her to vote the way he did. He told her that he didn't want her vote to cancel his vote. Of course, nobody knows if she really followed his instructions, but she most likely did."

—Anonymous

13. "My husband told me I should not vote because I am ignorant of the issues. I am ignorant because I do not follow Fox News 24/7. Also, if he finds out I voted behind his back, our home will experience silence for however long it takes for him to calm down, further indicating that it could possibly lead to divorce."

—Anonymous

14. "In 2016, 2020, AND this year, my partner at the time, as well as my father, have tried to convince me to vote against my own beliefs. I have voted in every election because they have tried so hard to get me to vote their way. The funny thing is, they never voted!! They called me names and tried telling me misinformation to sway my vote. And sometimes it was scary. Even now, my registration is hidden where only I know so I can guarantee my vote. Vote because this battle will never end unless you do something!"

—Anonymous

15. "Unfortunately, yes, I listened to my then-husband on who I should vote for. Now he's my ex. 😁"

—Anonymous

16. "My husband and I worked the polls in Pennsylvania. He was a judge of elections. A husband wanted to go in the booth with his wife, but, by law, wasn't noted on her voter registration. So, she thought she could not vote. My husband took her to the sample setup and showed her how to do it, and she went into the booth to vote. She came out so proud and said that was the first time she ever voted and would continue to do so from now on. She was in her 60s."

—Anonymous

17. "One of my grandmothers couldn't vote during her marriage because if she didn't vote the same as my grandfather, it would 'cancel out' his vote. Thankfully, she enjoyed the freedom to vote however she damn well pleased after she divorced him."

—Anonymous

And lastly:

18. "A couple of years ago, my husband discovered some videos by misogynistic men on the internet. They appealed to him because he's always had control issues. These podcasters also tend to lean right, even extreme right. He fell victim to their influence and now believes everything he hears. He was constantly trying to shove it down my throat and force me to believe what he believed. Since the election cycle began, it's been tenfold worse. He tries to force me to watch these things with him. He constantly lectures me about 'who is better for this country' and tries to get me to agree. He's played the victim when I tell him I don't want to talk politics. He doesn't want to hear my thoughts and then yells over me. He expects me 'to back him up as his wife' without regard for my thoughts and opinions. Oddly, I got him to admit that he just wants to control me, but I think he realizes he can't even though he still tries."

"What he's been doing amounts to voter intimidation and interference. I know it, but I am not sure if he does. Regardless, I will vote for who I think will best serve me and not how he wants me to. He hasn't tried to tell me that I can't or shouldn't vote, but he is constantly saying that he can't wait for the 19th Amendment to be repealed because women make really bad decisions and, therefore, should not have the right to do so, knowing full well he greatly supports taking my voice from me. When the election is over, there will still be no peace here. If his person wins, all hell will break loose, and he'll get bolder with his control tactics. If my person wins, I will never hear the end of how this country is going down the toilet."

—Anonymous

Remember, you have the right to a safe and secure vote, and voter intimidation is a federal crime. Federal law says it is illegal to "intimidate, threaten, or coerce any other person for the purpose of interfering with the right of such other person to vote or to vote as he may choose." While it's public record that you voted, how you filled out your ballot is not.

If you or someone you know is in immediate danger as a result of domestic violence, call 911. For anonymous, confidential help, you can call the 24/7 National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or chat with an advocate via the website.

Dial 988 in the US to reach the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Other international suicide helplines can be found at befrienders.org. The Trevor Project, which provides help and suicide-prevention resources for LGBTQ youth, is 1-866-488-7386.