1. |
My Lonely Ghost
02:51
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Where have you been, my lonely ghost?
With your bloody cheeks and starry eyes
I’d like to keep you safe - but when I try, you always seem to realize that I'm still alive
Inside of a building filled with flames, where all your pieces fell like rain
While all the children slept at home, their mothers cried when you became my lonely ghost
And you spilled your little tears across the ocean-colored sky when you knew the time had come to let the light inside of you die
And you asked, “Why?”
Now you’re in fields of debris, your ashes growing with the weeds
And in my dreams I bury you in a better place, where all the bluebirds sing
I’ll paint my heart in spirals on a mountainside with you in mind
Your little cries so clear to me that when I sleep, it’s you I see
And it makes me cry
Flying pianos crash into the lakes - with your mothers' eyes, your father's name
Now I never sleep, I only dream - while in my bed you rush to me
Run off and catch your better days
Where the sun kisses your little face and you smile for me
I’ll never leave you, lonely ghost
I know you’re feeling left behind
Only when your little spirit flies in clouds of smoking waves, I will say goodbye
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2. |
Figure Eights
03:58
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If I made it to your bedroom, I would never leave
Faded reflections fill the water, they look just like me
I sit in my house and look around for scattered pieces of anything
Never been good at spilling my guts, you are going to have to pull them right out of me
But if you make it out of the weeds, you will stumble over your feet
Then I’ll bite down and look away because that is easy
And if I am barely hanging in, then I’ll get by on sleight of hand
I need a spot where I can lean and scribble my plans
Still not sure of them
Well, that’s just too damn bad for you!
That’s too damn bad for both of us!
I draw figure eights with my words, they never find a place to land
Though I’m feeling real old and you’re getting there too, I love you now like I loved you then
We are dressed for success and our neckties cut our airflow
Now that we are wooden, we are focused
I said, “that’s too damn bad for us”
And you said, “no, that’s too bad for you!”
I am so confident
Either that, or I’m full of shit
And maybe I’m incompetent stacked on top of it
I am always overwhelmed
Every big and little thing crashes hard into me
It gets swept underneath
And it took a lifetimes worth of work to be as unpleasant as I am
And I don’t think that I will ever turn it back
Yeah, it took a lifetimes worth of work to become as careless as I am
And I don’t think that I will ever turn it back
Well, that’s just too damn bad for you!
That’s too damn bad for both of us!
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3. |
Made Of Wax
03:09
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I caught you staring at the mirror
You were looking at yourself as if you’ve aged 20 years
It’s daylight, your head is in the sand
Love is a losing game, no one ever wins
I don’t miss you, I never used to
I don’t even think about you, I never care to
And I don’t want to be the bearer of bad news
But if you come through, I don’t want to see you
I’m calculated, I am well practiced
And I have been that way a hundred years
You move your mouth just to hear your voice, you shut your eyes to miss the point
Then you pretend you’re different
I could explain it, can’t make you understand
Empty spaces you don’t visit
I see a monument for what you once had
And you’re not stupid, you’re just not good at thinking
Or maybe you are just dead and I’m just always dreaming
Your heart is made of wax
Every small misstep that you couldn't mend makes a bigger mess
Secret is safe with me, I wasn’t listening
I could explain it, can’t make you understand
You burnt bright, it is true
Now you’re nothing but fumes
Silence is louder than me screaming at you
And I don’t think you are clever like you do
I don’t even think about you
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4. |
Morningstar
03:05
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Morningstar, don’t eat my heart
Tell me why you want this world to be all yours
In your cloud of light that no one dare climb
I’m asleep soundly in your palm
Oh, Morningstar - don’t eat my heart
With your face painted red and your big, red horns
Riding on a thundercloud in the dark
Oh, Morningstar – don't eat my heart
I feel you close but I can’t see where you are
Through the trees, shapes shift - glowing eyes in the mist
Candles flickering in the wind burn out with a wisp
And so long are the shadows when the moon keeps hanging on
And when the arrows cut through the night, I pray they’ll miss
Oh, Morningstar – don't eat my heart
I can feel you close but I can’t see where you are
They’ll dance to the beat of drums, they’ll sing till the deed is done
And I’ll rest all through the summer into the fall
Will you remember me when I’m gone?
When I’m face down in the fields, out where all the daises grow, where the sun sweeps down the hills
Will you remember me when I’m gone?
In your cloud of light that no one dare climb
I’m sound asleep with you forevermore
Oh, Morningstar – don't eat my heart
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5. |
Always Right
03:43
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Tell me something that I don’t know and I will carry your baggage and go
I’m not lost, I’m just taking the longer way back home
I know it’s never good to be always right
That’ll be a dull ride alone
We drive with lights off at night
Leave the windows open to the snow
My mind is made up and it’s two faced
You’ll have to let me sleep on it
If you stand single file, then the road is paved
You just head straight the whole way
I know it’s not heroic, and it has never been – to put on a brave face and roll
If I need to be told twice, that’s a disappointment
But that’s just the way it goes
And sometimes all that I really want is to be loved, but I’d never admit that to us
Moving my mouth, saying nothing, the jokes aren’t landing much
Have I lost my charm?
I stand behind your shadow sometimes, and still bloom a thousand pedals
Well, I love you so and that’s by design
Collecting tears like medals
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6. |
Navy Blue
04:06
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Navy blue, I’ve become so lost without you
Navy blue, I’ve become so tired – I almost feel new
I heard the wind crying out, “I will never come to save you”
I saw the sky just tumbling down and the darkness shining through
We opened up on the hillside and all of the mountains became new
And everything was burning red - but you were still just navy blue
Navy blue, when you come around – I won’t even know
And I’ll say it’s true to all of the colors in my head
And the man that I once knew will lay down to rest
I heard the wind crying out, “I will never come to save you”
I saw the sky just tumbling down and the darkness shining through
We opened up on the hillside and all of the mountains became new
And everything was burning red - but you were still just navy blue
Navy blue, you had everything I loved - now I don’t look the same
And I know it’s true, I see the colors in my head
And the man that you once knew is now behind the mask
I heard the wind crying out, “I will never come to save you”
I saw the sky just tumbling down and the darkness shining through
We opened up on the hillside and all of the mountains became new
And everything was burning red - but you were still just navy blue
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7. |
Motorbike
03:52
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Sitting on my motorbike - my knotted hair, my glassy eyes
I turned around to wave goodbye after I got my balance right
I’m never going to see you again, how could I?
I know damn well who you are – midwestern bred, Ohio blood
Laid on the roof, looked at the stars - I pointed up, “That one is yours!”
You glue your eyes shut and it explodes into a million bits of fool's gold
Ain’t that so sad it happened like that?
I could cry just thinking about you hurting
Eat my meals with plastic forks - saves lots of space in the drawer
I’ve never been so alone, I’ve never felt so evil
I’m trying to outdo myself here
I’ve got my very own boots to fill
That, you can bet - it's a proven fact
You can bet your body on it
You will
Turn on the van, pull down the webs, sweep up the mess with my bare hands
Said I could be your new best friend or the worst enemy you’ve had
I’m pacing around in circles again
I’m talking to myself in the mirror
Looks like I get the last laugh
You can go take that to the bank, haul ass
I could cry just looking at you again
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8. |
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If I live to come of age, then I’ll see you along the way
If I’m down to the wire, I’ll find beauty in endings
There’s an empty space beside me where you were just yesterday
And I’m missing you so bad that your void is an entity
And I’m right on cue, my muscles loose, I’m gunning it to you
I think I saw you on the TV – making moves
When I was a kid, I would shake the universe with the wave of my hands at the edge of the earth
And although I’ll never get used to change, it’s always how it ends
I know that being strong means accepting that you’re dead
I’ve been feeling blue, a few screws loose - I’m staying glued for you
I think I saw you on the highway - passing through
You know, I dream about you all of the time
Hitchhiking on a mountain, swimming through a fire
Look at you, making a ghost appear to mortal eyes
Stranger things have happened, you’ll outdo them in time
It’s through and through, my pain is old news
Thought I’d see you once again, that wasn’t true
Thought I heard you talking to me – it wasn’t you
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9. |
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Oh, Andreas – I think of your face almost every night
And there in the wreckage, I could see you glowing bright
You light the sky – shooting stars and shimmering fireflies
Like the sun when it’s just opened its own eye
Even wind blows heavy on grey mornings when the streets run white with snow
We’d go passing through green hills along the road
And I always knew you were someone that I could look up to
Oh, Andreas – with a heart made in shades of blue and white
Pure as the morning, like the rushing of the tide
So let me just slip into you as if you never had died
Let me just drift into dreams so I can see you smile
And this song comes easy, as does rain, as the rivers flow - as the earth fills up in the spring and the flowers grow
You know, it would take all the courage that I have to let you go
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10. |
Everygreen
03:48
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Through the mirror I am looking at, we’re nowhere
And I don’t know why but it looks so clear to me
In all of the saddest parts, you’ll find the answers
And I don’t know why but they speak so loud to me
Hold your breath, move past the county line
We’ve got a long way to drive, but that’s alright
It isn’t so new to me
Was there a prize after all?
It doesn’t feel like I’ve won
And I don’t know why it gets so lost on me
Let me know that you will be there either way
Because things won’t be the same after the ache I dish out so effortlessly
I can’t understand the inner web I’m caught on
These days, I’m so bored - shrouded in white noise
And I don’t know why
But it feels so evergreen
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11. |
Along The Way
03:27
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I thought I knew you from somewhere
You must have been lost along the way
With a shoe full of sand and a head full of rain, you’re hustling through the noise
And though you’ve signed your name on the red dotted line - you ain’t seen nothing, boy
When you call, I don’t see
I don’t even hear the phone ring
My house is made of mirrors and they are hanging loose, they will fall right onto you
I’m making my way and I’m getting there soon, so tell me the truth
I’m on a tightrope, afraid to let it go with my motivation
And I’m boarding the plane with a ticket to nowhere soon
I saw you out yesterday
Somehow you were lost along the way
You’re in for a surprise if you’re thinking I might be willing to bend a bit
You’re making your choice and I’ve made my mind
And that’s the way it is
I don’t want to be caught dead with my shorts at the knees
You can be everything or you can be nothing
And you can learn a lesson or you can play with the flames along the way
When you call, I don’t see
I don’t even hear the phone ring
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12. |
Nice To Mice
03:51
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I used to play by ear, now I use both of my hands
If you don’t ask – well, then you don’t get
And if you don’t take, then someone else will
But when I look at you, I’m scared to
Can’t control the weather, I’m letting it through
I’ll gladly take the credit for the things that you do
You put a playlist on to match your mood
I’m proficient in losing my cool
It’s not that I can’t hear, I just don’t want to
There’s no more small talking
I would rather put it to the side
Ride in elevators all day
Then you won’t have to learn to drive
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Mat Kerekes Michigan
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